Craigslist Crapshoot

The World’s Worst Car Is For Sale On Craigslist
Welcome to Craigslist Crapshoot, our weekly search for the most bizarre, awesome, and/or terrible vehicles that the online classifieds has to offer. 
Last week you brought us the best in bad ideas, and boy was there a lot to cogitate on. We’ll get bad to the bone right after the jump, but first this week’s Pebble Beach-themed quest.
Another Monterey weekend is in the record books, an event that is more rightfully the Monterey Week as it has expanded well beyond the traditional Historics at Laguna Seca and Pebble Beach Concours de Elegance. There’s also the 17-mile Drive Rally, the Lighthouse Rally and Show, The Concorso Italiano, auctions, and a ton of amazing iron to ogle just on the city streets and Pacific Coast Highway. I skipped this year owing to abject poverty but would like to return next year. To do so I’d probably need something pretty fancy and interesting to drive and what better time to start looking than now, and who better to help than you? Of course, I’m not all that flush so please keep the prices to under $25,000. I think that’s about what a kidney goes for these days.
As always, we want your finds to go down in infamy and not in the site’s spam filter. Since we’ve changed commenting systems, you may need to update your commenter account. Make sure you have a Disqus account – they’re free and easy to get – and then comment away.

Got that? Great, now let’s get bad.


There are so many bad choices one can make over the course of one’s life. There’s marrying into the Kardashian clan, thinking that you’ll just try doing Meth just one time (that’s it, just once), or perhaps worst of all, buying a car or truck that needs… something. That last one is like dating someone who’s kind of a dick thinking, “I can change them.
Yeah, truth be told you aren’t going to change the fact that a Land Rover Disco is a ticking time bomb of wallet-emptying despair that will turn your family against you and allow those beneath you to point and laugh at your poor choices. That’s every single one of them, there isn’t a Monday/Friday Disco, they’re all bad pennies. And yet still many of you want one. You people confuse me.
There’s no confusion about our winner however, which is this 1989 Lotus Esprit found by Jeepster. Holy Rock and Rollie Pollie, where to begin? The Esprit, much like the Land Rover Discovery, was never a paragon of reliability and toughness, no matter what that Top Gear Argentine show said. Of course, in this car’s case replacing the turbo four (V4, seriously seller?) with an iron block SBC should make it more reliable and cheaper to repair right?
Yeah, I don’t think so. I also don’t think that 350 is putting out anywhere near the claimed 520-bhp the ad says it does. There’s also the poor shape of the bodywork, and the fact that it is being sold “Parts Only” which means its days working the streets are as over as are Julia Roberts.’ Topping off the awfulness is the fact that it’s offered in Miami.
Congrats to Jeepster for finding so strong a cautionary tale, and thanks to you all for the rest of the bad decisions none of us hopefully will make.
1989 Lotus Esprit

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The maximum upload file size: 64 MB. You can upload: image, audio, video. Links to YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and other services inserted in the comment text will be automatically embedded. Drop files here

38 responses to “Craigslist Crapshoot”

    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      Aside from too many people mistaking it for a Biturbo, this would be an excellent choice… for a Canadian visiting Monterey. It’s not old enough to legally import to the US, and not quite rare enough or special enough for a show and display exemption.

    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      That’s a really nice find.

  1. Kiefmo Avatar
    Kiefmo

    But only if you show up wearing a pin striped suit with matching fedora, and are brandishing a Thompson submachine gun with a drum magazine.
    1933 Dodge Sedan
    http://images.craigslist.org/00n0n_sfdNlxvhiJ_600x450.jpg
    http://kansascity.craigslist.org/cto/5160803008.html

  2. PotbellyJoe★★★★★ Avatar
    PotbellyJoe★★★★★

    http://images.craigslist.org/00h0h_65oKPvhFoWy_600x450.jpg
    http://newyork.craigslist.org/jsy/cto/5141879040.html
    $15,500
    1972 MERCEDES 350 SL HARD-TOP CONV. V8
    Read about it here because it’s in all capps o the CL listing (THANK YOU SHIFT+F3)
    Call: show contact info just passed ny state inspection this
    october!
    This is a rare 1972 mercedes-benz
    350 sl 3-speed automatic, with just over 100k highway miles, packed with a
    powerful 4.5 liter v8 engine, that puts out about 230 horses, with 285 lbs of
    torque!! The fully independent suspension, accounts for a sturdy, yet smooth
    ride and decent handling, even at today’s standards. It has been recently owned
    and well-cared for since 2010. Since then, it has been garaged and driven less
    than 1,000 miles! There have been quite a few recent significant, mechanical
    repairs.
    The exterior paint is a beautiful
    candy-apple-red and is in exceptional condition, no rusting at all! This early
    model r107 has a smaller front bumper, which adds to the car’s sleek design.
    The drop-top is in great shape and comes with all needed accessories. Aside
    from a few dings, which are hardly visible, the exterior is near perfect!
    The interior is completely
    original, all black leather in amazing condition! The dashboard and console is
    original, with a working am/fm radio. The a/c needs to be repaired and there
    have been quite a few recent significant, mechanical repairs, which will soon
    be listed, which adds value to the car.
    Do not pass on a chance to own
    one of the most popular lines of cars in the world, in a rare model, in
    excellent style and condition. Organized visits are more than welcome at the
    garage, where the vehicle is kept. Just contact the number above. Thank you for
    viewing.

  3. mdharrell Avatar

    “…more rightfully the Monterey Week as it has expanded well beyond the traditional Historics at Laguna Seca and Pebble Beach Concours de Elegance. There’s also the 17-mile Drive Rally, the Lighthouse Rally and Show, The Concorso Italiano, auctions, and a ton of amazing iron to ogle just on the city streets and Pacific Coast Highway.”
    I only went for the Concours d’LeMons.
    https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/11870904_10153223305619495_5239384662576721265_n.jpg?oh=70cf30ec11118ff5694acea596aa5c34&oe=56460B1A

    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      “De Luxe” will forever trigger this image in my head, as traffic basically consisted of black plastic “De Luxe” lettering around me as a kid:
      http://www.derzwickauer.de/universal_s_de_luxe_1978.jpg

      1. Krautwursten Avatar
        Krautwursten

        For Trabant standards the De Luxe was loaded with features though. Intermittent wipers, four way hazards (that’s right, hazards were an option), imitation leather seats, a radio, carpets, fog lights, a resettable daily odometer, a fuel gauge (that’s right, a fuel gauge was an option) aaaand headrests.

        1. Sjalabais Avatar
          Sjalabais

          They really knew how to add meaning to “de luxe”! I always felt that all Trabbis were “de luxe”?

  4. PotbellyJoe★★★★★ Avatar
    PotbellyJoe★★★★★

    If we were trying to go under the radar at a event…
    http://newjersey.craigslist.org/cto/5129143664.html
    http://images.craigslist.org/00l0l_6bKYWgljdci_600x450.jpg
    *2005 BMW 760LI 45K Original Miles/Garage Kept** – $21000
    Sure it’s branded as a lemon for the rear wheel noise that was corrected for, but it’s cheaper than a Camry and has 3 times the cylinders. I could deal with a 438-hp execu-cruiser with a fridge (hold my beer) and seat massagers for cruising.
    I mean sure, a lot of guys at these events may have similar at home, but they probably paid 3 times as much for it.

  5. ptschett Avatar
    ptschett

    Optional accessories: Cowboy hat, CB radio, semi hauling Coors
    http://fargo.craigslist.org/cto/5168481560.html
    http://images.craigslist.org/00H0H_4HPwdehKQYr_600x450.jpg

    1. dukeisduke Avatar
      dukeisduke

      An Alpine stereo, and an equalizer? Sweet!

    2. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      That’s a tough sell without T-tops or the screaming chicken decals.

  6. smalleyxb122 Avatar
    smalleyxb122

    1953 Kaiser for $8500. It will both fit in and stand out among the six and seven figure rides around Monterey Week. All for four figures.
    http://images.craigslist.org/00808_cJlaxL5xkiN_600x450.jpg
    http://toledo.craigslist.org/cto/5109832254.html

  7. GTXcellent Avatar
    GTXcellent

    What better way to cruise the Monterey peninsula than with a Monterey
    http://images.craigslist.org/01717_ftbNCycVR6X_600x450.jpg
    http://grandforks.craigslist.org/cto/5160337306.html

  8. danleym Avatar
    danleym

    Hey, hey! I take offense to that Disco comment, I own one and it has been nothing short of….
    No, no, wait a minute, I think you’ve described it perfectly.

  9. AnamDuine Avatar
    AnamDuine

    http://up.craigslist.org/cto/5164032772.html
    This has dog dish hub caps, but is still pretty fancy… for an A-body.

  10. AnamDuine Avatar
    AnamDuine

    http://up.craigslist.org/cto/5164032772.html
    Interesting, yes! Fancy, not so much.

  11. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    I honestly have trouble looking for cars that expensive…Starting with Japan-fancy: 1982 Mazda 929 Coupé, 91000km, 2500$:
    http://finncdn.no/mmo/2015/8/vertical-3/19/5/632/217/15_909186397_xl.jpg
    http://finncdn.no/mmo/2015/8/vertical-3/19/5/632/217/15_1059575204_xl.jpg
    Ridiculously well-kept interior, but rust is starting to show on some corners and the doors.
    1981 Volvo 262 Bertone, 66000km, 17000$:
    http://finncdn.no/mmo/2015/8/vertical-3/18/2/631/589/12_869129333_xl.jpg
    US-import sold by one of the best known 262 collectors in Europe.
    Could anything possibly be more fancy or interesting than a 1976 Morris Marina, 82000km, 1800$?:
    http://finncdn.no/mmo/2015/8/vertical-3/17/5/631/367/85_400852239_xl.jpg
    Alternatively, this fine 1982 Lancia Beta 2000 Coupe, 57000km, 7000$ might be of interest:
    http://finncdn.no/mmo/2015/8/vertical-3/01/9/623/834/29_915755079_xl.jpg
    That’s what I got for Norway. 🙂

    1. Nicolas Bernard Avatar
      Nicolas Bernard

      The Marina has probably been crushed by a piano by now.

      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        I noted how he just called the car “Morris [displacement]” in the ad. Collective trauma for Marina-owners…

    1. David Avatar
      David

      On that yellow TaGAZ Akela… Did the stylists and engineers for that car ever, you know, meet each other before production started?

      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        I think all of them thought they were working on a 1:43 diecast…

  12. Guest Avatar
    Guest

    How ’bout 10 Lincolns?

    $2500 each, so $25 000 total.

    Lincoln = A retirees idea of luxury. 10 Cars = Interesting to Drive

    1. 1978 Lincoln town coupe

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/ODAwWDYwMA==/z/3lQAAOSw~gRV1NX7/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/edmonton/1978-lincoln-town-coupe/1096095328?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    2. Lincoln town car

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NTc2WDEwMjQ=/z/QE8AAOSwPcVVnWvb/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/st-albert/lincoln-town-car/1085913275?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    3. 1993 Lincoln LS Coupe (2 door)

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NjAwWDgwMA==/z/3gcAAOSwyQtVx4Ov/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/strathcona-county/1993-lincoln-ls-coupe-2-door/1093517865?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    4. 2000 Lincoln LS $2500 OBO

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NTMzWDgwMA==/z/vtYAAOSwPcVVwN2q/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/red-deer/2000-lincoln-ls-2500-obo/1092288773?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    5. 1988 Lincoln Continental town

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/ODAwWDYwMA==/z/apgAAOSwMmBVr9wJ/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/edmonton/1988-lincoln-continental-town/1089148287?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    6. 1967 lincoln continental

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NjAwWDgwMA==/z/IY0AAOSwDNdV0jEp/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-classic-cars/lloydminster-ab/1967-lincoln-continental/1095558638?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    7. 1976 Lincoln Mark V

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NDUwWDgwMA==/z/PKsAAOSwjVVVwQRF/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-classic-cars/edmonton/1976-lincoln-mark-v/1092338420?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    8. 1975 Lincoln mark4

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NjAwWDgwMA==/z/2G4AAOSwjVVVkhDd/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-classic-cars/calgary/1975-lincoln-mark4/1083891367?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    9. 1999 Lincoln Continental Luxury package Sedan

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NjAwWDgwMA==/z/JQEAAOSwl8NVb4m-/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/cranbrook/1999-lincoln-continental-luxury-package-sedan/1077368208?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

    10. 94 Lincoln markviii

    http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NzY4WDEwMjQ=/z/kkAAAOSw9N1VnEmD/$_27.JPG

    http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/nanaimo/94-lincoln-markviii/1085739805?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

  13. KAC Avatar
    KAC

    Interesting to drive? Check! Fancy? Depends on your definition. Might stand out even amongst all the interesting machinery around. F-group Corolla.
    http://www.nettiauto.com/en/toyota/corolla/7444092
    http://image.nettiauto.com/extra/carimg/00/07/44/40/92/toyota-corolla-7444092_l_e37844f48a986369.jpg

  14. KAC Avatar
  15. Krautwursten Avatar
    Krautwursten

    Rolls-Royce engine, 2,000 miles on the clock, $22,400 negotiable. Any questions?
    http://suchen.mobile.de/fahrzeuge/details.html?id=214109632&lang=en

    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      I don’t know how well it would fit in at Monterey, but I want a Ferret so badly that I had to give this an up vote. That Jay Leno owns a Ferret lends some merit to its inclusion here. He is, after all, a collector of a discriminating taste.

      1. Krautwursten Avatar
        Krautwursten

        It becomes fancy enough when you wear a plaid dinner jacket in it.