Classic Captions – The 1971 Pontiac Grand Prix SSJ Hurst Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post. Yes, it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so once again it’s time to review the premise of this feature; I search for images that were used by the car companies (or in this case, Car Equipment Providers) in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. This week we have an interesting picture of a Special Edition Pontiac, with Miss Hurst Golden Shifter herself included!

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Last time, we had an image of a Street Gang with a Dodge Daytona, and we had a pretty good turnout for the week. However, I want to show my appreciation for all of our fans on how you conducted your comments this time. We learned a lot, especially from dukeisduke, who brought to our attention how significant “Big Willie” Robinson was in the Los Angeles Street Scene during the 70’s and 80’s. You may not have won the caption contest, but you did win my gratitude in bringing this significant person to this Hoons attention.

So let’s get back to the contest… The runner-up comment was from one of our more frequent guests, skitter. His caption went like this: “Some say he throws a Dodge Daytona in the shot put. And also, somewhat controversially, in the Javelin.” This was a very well thought out caption, but there was one just a bit better…

This week, the winning caption came from Alff (Yes, Again…), and his winning caption went this way: “What’s the part that tends to break, When there’s too much torque about? Shaft!” This was very funny, and period correct, so congratulations Alff on winning the Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and we must all hail Miss Hurst Golden Shifter herself, the voluptuous Linda Vaughn. Miss Vaughn was the spokes model for Hurst Performance Products, from about 1964 right up through present day, though it has been written that she relinquished the Miss Golden Shifter title in the mid 1980’s. The Pontiac in this advertisement image was a special custom conversion that was performed by Hurst and sold through select Pontiac Dealers. How many were sold, and what equipment was installed beside Paint and Trim is a mystery to me, but according to the original ad, the White Letter Tires and Special Wheels were optional. Now, is this really the way to sell a special model to the general public in the waning days of the Muscle Car, or did the Hurst Company hit the nail on the head? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (You know what I will be zeroing in on…), we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this provocative image.

Photo Credit: Classic Cars Today Online

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