Last Call: See What We've Become Edition


North Carolina likes to have First in Flight on their license plates, touting the Wright Brothers’ work at Kitty Hawk on the state’s outer banks. This Viper is apparently licensed in North Carolina, and I can’t think of anything that could cause a faster flight away from the state than this.
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35 responses to “Last Call: See What We've Become Edition”

  1. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    If I were a Terminator, and could go back in time and find J.C. Whitney as a young boy… at this point I don’t know if I’d kill him or have him installed as out 45th United States President.

  2. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    If I were a Terminator, and could go back in time and find J.C. Whitney as a youngster… at this point I don’t know if I would kill him or have him installed as our 45th President of the United States.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e34deb0de9e1c088fa7735d2d8201f01674eab830f28598b0c7b90cf3328c2ec.png

    1. dukeisduke Avatar
      dukeisduke

      I remember some of that stuff, like the pipe organ speakers, and things like the stuffed cat you put in your rear window, that had eyes that blinked with your turn signals. I grew up in the ’60s, and we used to get the J.C. Whitney catalogs in the mail. I’d sit down and just flip through the pages, looking at all the crazy stuff.

      1. CraigSu Avatar
        CraigSu

        Why is your Volvo missing its roof and rear window? This surely deserves a post all by itself. I can’t say I’ve ever seen a Volvo art car until now. The Hooniversal overlords should contact you for a story (or vice-versa).

        1. I_Borgward Avatar
          I_Borgward

          I’m game. Between building my car, arting it out and the artcar world in general, there’s no lack of material to work with.
          ps: The window is there on the back seat, under the green blanket. Top is in the trunk.

      2. Fuhrman16 Avatar
        Fuhrman16

        Why settle for Winky the white cat when you can build a Wanky the Safety Cat!
        http://jalopnik.com/238353/if-you-cant-buy-it-build-it-wanky-the-safety-cat

    2. outback_ute Avatar
      outback_ute

      Nah, a lot of that tish has taken some proper effort. To quote Maxwell Smart, why couldn’t he use his talent for niceness instead of evil.

  3. Matt Reynolds Avatar
    Matt Reynolds

    Guy is hanging out at Autozone. Probably needs a new crown air freshener for the dash.

  4. JayP Avatar
    JayP

    For fuck’s sake.

  5. kogashiwa Avatar
    kogashiwa

    I feel like it needs wire wheels.

    1. cap'n fast Avatar
      cap’n fast

      nah, ain’t lowered enough. needs bagged and scrappin’

  6. James Bodie Avatar
    James Bodie

    That’s a South Carolina license plate, just so you guys know.

    1. CraigSu Avatar
      CraigSu

      Indeed, someone (*cough* Robert *cough*) needs to brush up on his geography. Don’t try to palm that thing off on us North Carolinians. We have enough monstrosities to deal with already.

      1. Infamous007 Avatar
        Infamous007

        That is a SC plate.
        Exactly right Craig, Especially the cars that migrate to SC (liberal to virtually non-existent emissions laws) when they can not pass NC’s emissions test on the annual state vehicle inspection.
        It is a common trick (when the car fails the emissions test and the repair is very expensive) for NC residents (that have SC relatives) to “give” their cars to their relatives in SC who, in turn, register and title the car in SC to “loan” it back to the NC resident to take it back to NC and continue driving it. Some of those SC plates haven’t renewed registration in SC for over 2 years past the expiration date. I kid you not.
        Common trick #2. – From my experience working at a “feeder lot” owned by a family member of my sister’s first husband (R.I.P my ex brother-in-law), We would buy feeder cars (super high mile trade ins from the new car dealer, major wreck damage in early history on CARFAX, or trade ins from the new car dealer with known failed emissions, etc. because the dealer had to take the trade to make the sale) low (at slight profit to new dealer) and take the very high-risk cars (emissions problems under that category that a code reader read something very serious / costly qualified as high-risk) and rollback them to the car auctions in SC where the SC feeder lot owners would buy them (at a profit to us) and then they would appear on their lots for sale.
        So if you live in SC and see a used car on a feeder lot. Carfax it, and if it has a NC history, it is highly likely that there are potential emissions problems.
        Caveat emptor my friend

    2. Harry Callahan Avatar
      Harry Callahan

      Yup. That Viped guy ain’t no Yankee!

  7. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    It took me a while to figure out that those red things aren’t actually part of the car. ‘Nuff said.

    1. cap'n fast Avatar
      cap’n fast

      amused by the tacky add on spoiler in the middle of the trunk lid. the whole car looks tacky, at first i thought it may be a test mule in street disguise. still have my doubts about what it is.

  8. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    Just parked next to an eGolf who was to reverse out of its spot. Usually nothing that triggers a hoonmotional reaction, but I noticed that the VW-sign flipped up to let the reverse camera do its work. I’m split.
    Intuitively, another electromechanical motion that is bound to break and create a plethora of troubles.
    Logically, it’s a brilliant way to avoid a dirty and thus useless camera, as e.g. Toyotas struggle with.
    So, which of these concerns should weigh the most? After all, why design a car that needs a freakin’ camera to reverse in the first place? Sigh. And I just wanted to park.

    1. CraigSu Avatar
      CraigSu

      I’m not certain about the Euro safety standards (although, IMO they tend to be more stringent than the US) but here in the States backup cameras have been phasing in for a few years now. The final rules on the rear-visibility mandate, which applies to cars built after May 1, 2018, requires the field of
      view from the camera and screen to include a 10-foot by 20-foot zone
      directly behind the vehicle. The system must meet other requirements
      including image size, linger time, response time, durability and
      deactivation.

      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        True, I’ve seen some of that on J-nik. I’m actually not aware of any legislation of this kind here, and VW is absolutely not among the worst offenders when it comes to visibility. Just found this way of hiding and keeping the camera clean very interesting.

      2. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        This frivolous regulation angers me.

        1. CraigSu Avatar
          CraigSu

          The other side of the regulatory coin is that it continues to add to the cost of a car. Inflation notwithstanding, the average price for a new car is now $33,560 using data from the 2015-16 model year (http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/cars/2015/05/04/new-car-transaction-price-3-kbb-kelley-blue-book/26690191/).

        2. CraigSu Avatar
          CraigSu

          To add fuel to the fire, this UC Davis study from 2004 conservatively concluded “regulations would account for one-fifth of price increases and about one-eighth
          of the total vehicle price.” http://www.des.ucdavis.edu/faculty/handy/TTP_seminar/Access_Price_of_Regs.pdf
          I say conservative because the study was commissioned by CARB to prove that the regulations imposed by California didn’t impose an undue burden on the consumer!? Given their watered down figure of $2500 per MY2001 vehicle, the actual number was $4020! In 2001! Who knows what it is today given 8 years of regulatory control by the previous administration which wasn’t shy about producing new regulations.

          1. Sjalabais Avatar
            Sjalabais

            I’m sure a lot of the regulation is meaningful and makes sense? We Scandinavians like to complain about prices, but the other side of that coin is that everyone earns a living wage and social security, health care and education are top notch.

          2. CraigSu Avatar
            CraigSu

            I’d like to believe the regulations are largely meaningful and make sense but you can only legislate to a certain level before it becomes onerous and/or intrusive. How do you meaningfully determine the acceptable cost/benefit ratio of said regulations? How much do you legislate to protect people from themselves? Some say making seat belts mandatory wasn’t necessary; that the industry would have eventually added them as standard equipment as more people demanded them in their cars. There’s also the (rather crude) argument that by mandating seat belts there were certain people who survived accidents that society might have benefited from them being eliminated from the gene pool. As someone once said, “You can’t legislate stupidity”.

          3. Sjalabais Avatar
            Sjalabais

            Yeah, but…wow. If you want to discuss it on a cost analysis level only, the spreadsheet tends to grow. Maybe purchasing a vehicle means that 30% of the car’s price are the result of regulation. But if you expect most of that regulation to be equipment that would trickle down to all cars anyway (eg seatbelts), that cost is highly theoretical and in all cases diminishing itself over time; economies of scale count here, too.
            Next are the surrounding costs. If you crash a 30000$ car, walk away, but need to wreck the machine, I’m not sure that is more expensive than handling mangled bodies, having years long hospital bills coupled with the reduction of income to a family, but also all sorts of economic activity and taxes missing if someone can’t work anymore.
            So basically in order to save society a huge bill, you push up private bills a little. I can get behind that. Doesn’t mean that all regulation makes sense (still legislated by people), or that it doesn’t suck not to be able to buy a new UAZ or Hindustan Ambassador. But, overall, there are good benefits here.

        3. Ol' Shel' Avatar
          Ol’ Shel’

          Life is frivolous to some people.

        4. cap'n fast Avatar
          cap’n fast

          the only way to control the cost of new cars is to have a regulation requiring that every one buys a new car every year. here in the states, thus increasing number of units moved and lowering the unit cost by economies of scale.
          the projected vehicle would be a yugo-like clone with a one cylinder steam engine powered by a closed loop hydrogen boiler. test markets in boulder, co. and texarkana indicate that the car would work well everywhere.
          we could have the IRS check that this is done and if not we could fine the foul miscreants who failed to buy a new car and give the cash to jerries kids.
          forward into the future!

    2. Turbobrick Avatar
      Turbobrick

      I’d worry about how well that is going to work in Ivalo when it’s -40C.
      But other than that, VW is so broke right now I’d image they’re going to be using that same mechanism for the next quarter century. Once the Chinese aftermarket starts cranking out inexpensive copies it’ll be no bigger deal than putting on new fuel flap hinges on a Volvo.

  9. Mason Avatar
    Mason

    Proof that money and good taste do not always travel together.

    1. nanoop Avatar

      Put it in a positive phrase: Money can buy bad taste, too!

  10. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    I bet if you peeled all that crap off of there you’d find a Miata.

    1. Luxury Lexus Land-yacht Avatar
      Luxury Lexus Land-yacht

      I was going to suggest a Fiero, but well done, sir. Well done.

  11. Turbobrick Avatar
    Turbobrick

    I see something like this and first thing comes to my mind is extensive hail / collision damage underneath all that crap. Because surely, no one starts piling that much junk on a healthy body, right?