This 1958 advertisement for Dodge Trucks tells a story, but I frankly have no idea what it is. You have a truck, and fencing, and what looks to be bags of fertilizer or sakrete. And you’re going to the bank. Okay, so the message is that you can do work and save money with a Dodge truck. Got it. But the newsboy on the bike? At the other drive-up teller window? He’s there for what reason? I don’t know, but I am sure you can think of a funny, clever, or perhaps genuine reason why this would make sense in a truck ad. In any case, leave your quip, caption or comment below.
Last week’s Buick Century ad was definitely cringe-worthy, and you guys made the most of it. Alff took the top spot with, “When life gives you lemons, make colonnade.” In second place was 1977ChevyTruck with his comment, “The large crowd dissipated pretty quickly after someone pointed out that the car said ‘Free Spirit’, and not ‘Free Spirits’, like they were hoping.”
Classic Captions Contest – 1958 Dodge Truck Edition
By Peter Tanshanomi
Jan 9, 2017
By Peter Tanshanomi
Tanshanomi is Japanese [単車のみ] for "motorcycle(s) only." Though primarily tasked with creating two-wheel oriented content for Hooniverse, Pete is a lover of all sorts of motorized vehicles.
Kamil Kaluski 
Robby DeGraff
Lane planned to build a concrete reinforced fence to keep the paperboy away, but ultimately, he figured it was easier to just swing by the bank to get the two dollars.
He couldn’t Dodge me forever.
http://www.liketotally80s.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/better-off-dead-paperboy-1.jpg
“Kinda tough pedaling?”
“Could always be worse, at least I’m not stuck driving a ’58 Dodge”
Nice mid-century bank building!
The new Dodges are butt ugly, and you can take that to the bank.
After Bob and Susan moved away, taking the only motor vehicle in town with them, the bank went ahead and changed the sign to read “Ride In Pedal Bank.”
“Welcome to Drive In Motor Bank. How may I help you?”
“Yeah, I’m gonna need a couple of L-heads and a Hemi, and I’d like to place a deposit for one of those cross-rams when they come out. Oh, and a Whizzer for the kid back there.”
“Cheeseburger and fries, please.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, sir, we’re a bank”
“Oh my goodness, I must be wearing the wrong contact lenses. I’m just glad I wore the right ones this morning when I collected this bright red Dodge Coronet from my dealer”
And some flapjacks.
“I’d like two breeder hogs”
“Sir?”
“This is a motor bank right?
“Well get me breeder hogs out of that there piggy bank and put it into the bed of this Dodge”
“That’s not how it works”
“Look Miss if you don’t do as I ask I will be reporting this to the reporter right behind us. He’s big in the news industry!”
I’d just like to say that I have to knock on the window instead of ordering through the intercom when I bike through the Krispy Kreme Drive Thru because the Hot&Ready sign flicks on.
The paper boy will surely win over a kiss and teller with a suave line like that.
“Why do you have chicken-wire and feed in the back of your truck? Don’t you raise sheep?”
“No, I had to sell them when I couldn’t afford a Ram!”
Woo-hoo! Second place!
I’ll take it!
The small front wheel in the paper boy’s bicycle bothers me for some reason. I thought the small front wheel didn’t become a thing for bicycles until the 70’s.
As for a clever caption:
Ted found that his old truck was much less of a hinderance to picking up women than expected, but then even Billy was doing okay on his bicycle.I got nuthin’
For the chopper look, perhaps, but small front https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ae752a51338d4d090b88413841e5b029318c503054efb455f6993f28c4c97eb0.jpg wheels were a staple of delivery bikes much earlier.
“Granville, fetch yer cloth……!”
“Look,Lady. This is Boulder….with these seeds and ckickenwire, we can pay off the
mortgage in nuthin flat. How’s about another extension?”