Hooniverse Asks- Is Jaguar F-Pace The Stupidest Name Ever?

Jaguar-F-PACE-crossover-Detroit-Auto-Show
Detroit is one of the Big Kahunas of the Car Show circuit, and as such there’s typically a lot of important iron dropped each year at the winter extravaganza. That includes a butt-load of debuts which this year encompass both names that are familiar – Ford’s GT, Chevy’s Volt, etc, and some whose names are new to the scene. It’s the latter that have perhaps proven the most confounding as it seems that when it comes to car names, the well has finally run dry.
That of course has led to Chevy’s cheap seats Tesla fighter being unimaginatively named the Bolt, and perhaps more egregiously, the new SUV from Jaguar being anointed the F-Pace. I’d like to table for a moment discussion of the actual need for yet another cross-over, and least of all one from tweedy old Jaguar. Instead, i’d like to focus on that name, which does not seem to derive from either the brand’s providence, nor general common sense.
Now, we’ve been having a little fun with the name, calling it Pee-face and the like, and you know that it will only get worse when the poor car hits the market, as the auto sales landscape is nothing more than 8th grade with new car smell. The question for today however is whether this is just a minor mistep by the Brits, or if this is in fact the worst name ever chosen in the history of automotive name choosing. What do you think?
Image: DigitalTrends

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  1. Vavon Avatar
    Vavon

    F-Pace is definitely not the stupidest name ever… Not even close!
    <img src="http://demotywatory.pl//uploads/201012/1291572667_by_disnej684_600.jpg"><img src="http://www.billigstautos.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/daihatsu-naked.jpg&quot; width="600/">

  2. Kiefmo Avatar

    It isn't just for 7-year-old giggles that I keep accidentally calling it the P-FACE. My brain is transmogrifying it and I'm somehow seeing it like that.
    And I can't unsee it.
    Also, like so many new cars, it looks like an angry made up creature from some anime. This creature is called Peaface. It has a defensive power. You don't want to be on the receiving end of it.

    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      I see it as F* Pace. A slow going, angry blob.

  3. PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ Avatar
    PotbellyJoe ★★★★★

    I'm not a fan.
    I guess all of the other *-Type names were taken…
    It's not a terrible looking SUV (CX-17 concept). They really should have put some effort behind the nomenclature.
    I think it's be great if Jag went to an actual naming convention. Such as:
    XJ#- Large Sedan
    XF#- 'Family' sedan
    XK#- Sporting GT
    XR#- True sportscar
    XS#- SUV
    With the # being cylinders, and R can be added for the performance suspension and an S for a supercharger. D for Diesel.
    Plus that would make my eBay shopping much easier.

    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      The naming department at Jaguar has had its hiccups. Just taste this mouthful: Jaguar XJ-SC Sport R. When you're done saying this, all the sex appeal is gone.

  4. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    Well, there's the Madza La Puta, but I don't think it was ever used for taxi service…. As far as I know all the rides you got in a La Puta were free….
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mazda_Laputa

  5. dukeisduke Avatar
    dukeisduke

    Did Jaguar ask the Chinese to name it? It reminds me of "Prime Well" tires.

    1. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      Feeling thirsty? Drink some nice, refreshing… <img src="https://sp.yimg.com/ib/th?id=HN.608008769289850395&pid=15.1&P=0&quot; width=600>

  6. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
    C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

    Well, pretty stupid, yes, but it's not any worse than:
    CTS
    ATS
    XTS
    CS6 (or whatever the new, non-Fleetwood is going to be)
    MKV
    MKS

    1. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      Catera Touring Sedan makes sense though. The DTS and STS worked the same way. Can't really speak for the ATS and XTS though. Also don't know for the Mark Five or Mark Seven(ty?). I think they've used those before.

      1. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
        C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

        Yeah, I'll give 'em CTS…though it may as well stand for Cimmarron Touring Sedan.
        ETC/STS/DHS/DTS I has no problem with because at least they stood for names.
        I owned what I think may have had the longest name, ever.
        A 1985 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham d'elegance.
        Mark V and Mark VII? You mean Ferds, right? I mixed my makes, above.
        The Mark I was the first, and each one after was akin to a sequel. I'm good with this, too, because they were Continental Mark-somethings.

        1. pj134 Avatar
          pj134

          When it hits the 25 year mark I hope to own the Lancia Delta HF Integrale 16v Evoluzione II.
          I always figured Lincoln MKV, MKS, MKX, MKC, MKT and MKZ stood for Mark and then the number in Roman numerals. Apparently just about every letter has an unofficial number, T being 160, S being an abbreviation of Septem.

          1. mdharrell Avatar

            That's true sometimes in very late Latin, but S as a numerical abbreviation is typically taken as SEMIS, which unsurprisingly means one-half. On Roman coins it stands for SEMISSIS indicating a value one-half that of the coin known as an AS. Feel free to insert your own joke about half-assed etymologies here.

          2. pj134 Avatar
            pj134

            The Mark Half then.

          3. mdharrell Avatar

            A half-mark is six shillings and eight pence, which is to say one-third of a pound.
            I'm beginning to suspect Ford Motor Company did not think this through carefully at all.

    2. Devin Avatar
      Devin

      The Cadillac system does make sense to me, since the higher up in the model range you go, the bigger the letter tends to be. Though the CT6 is going to throw a wrench into that.

  7. pj134 Avatar
    pj134

    Infiniti will not stand for this blatent infringement. Starting next year all Inifinitis will be called Q(number of doors). This is to be followed by the whole model line being just Q when someone else steps up to the plate.

    1. wunno sev Avatar
      wunno sev

      ¿Infiniti….que?

  8. Elliott Avatar
    Elliott

    I can just envision some road rage infused commuter stuck behind one of these puttering along, looking at that name on its' rear end and yelling for them to pick up the F**kng Pace!! 🙂

  9. Devin Avatar
    Devin

    Obligatory Sniff Petrol link.
    Though it is better than Lincoln's MKX, because I still can't remember what a MKX is. Is it the big sedan?

    1. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      Ford Edge

      1. Devin Avatar
        Devin

        Ah. And now I'll probably forget it tomorrow, the whole weird meaningless jumble of letters thing makes me forget what their entire line is basically all the time. I suspect that the Infiniti Q-Who? line is going to have the same effect.

  10. ptschett Avatar
    ptschett

    In F-pace, no one can hear you fream?

    1. nanoop Avatar
      nanoop

      I said it yesterday, and I will say it again: Fpace, fe final pfrontier.

      1. NotJustDucky Avatar
        NotJustDucky

        These are the voyages of a car rented from Enterprise…

  11. NotJustDucky Avatar
    NotJustDucky

    Stupidest name ever? Not by a long shot. Stupidest name ever for a Jaguar? Yup.

  12. nanoop Avatar
    nanoop

    I want mine in this color:
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/cc/PACE_flag_(without_text).svg" width="200">

    1. Lokki Avatar
      Lokki

      Isn't that a Subaru?

      1. nanoop Avatar
        nanoop

        You, Sir, are a master of this game!

  13. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    Every time I see a Kia Candenza, or whatever it's called, I wonder if the Kia Chesterfield is next.
    This isn't a bad name, but the Mazda SUV isn't the greatest SUV in the world, it's just a Tribute.
    Oh, or Plymouth Breeze – I mean, someone must've just given up after they came up with Cirrus and Stratus.

    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      RE Plymouth Breeze:
      Focus groups were having a difficult time pronouncing Cumulonimbus.

      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        In the process, the suggestion "Plymouth Spitter" was wiped off the white chart.

    2. ptschett Avatar
      ptschett

      And then there's the Ford Aspire. Poor little thing, it just wants to be a real car.

      1. Vairship Avatar
        Vairship

        Back when all Fords were being renamed to Ex… (Explorer, Expedition), were they going to rename it to Expire?

  14. Batshitbox Avatar

    I foresee a gaggle of soccer moms in these, known to locals as The F-Troop
    <img src="http://www.tvacres.com/images/west2_f_troop_comic6.jpg"&gt;

  15. Tomsk Avatar

    "F-Pace" is pretty egregious, but there's another upcoming British brand that wants to stake a claim to the moronic luxury SUV name throne: The Bentley Bentayga.
    To me, "Bentayga" sounds like a series of angsty young-adult novels set in an ancient Pacific island civilization. That, or a hilariously low-tech game, a la Jenga.

  16. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    I just hope it sells well. Otherwise, it will be known as the F-bomb.

  17. craigsu Avatar
    craigsu

    Perhaps the P is silent like in Psycho.

  18. Rover_1 Avatar
    Rover_1

    Definitley not
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c2/EdsellogoE.svg/600px-EdsellogoE.svg.png"width="250"&gt;
    And then the styling didn't help. Edsel, with a name like that how could it succeed?

  19. hubba Avatar
    hubba

    I haven't seen anyone note that the classic tagline for Jaguar is "Grace, pace, and space".

    1. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      "Grace, Pace, Space and Pee-Face"?