Hooniverse Asks- What Non-Car Company Would You Most Like To See Build One?


Most of the companies building cars these days have been doing so for decades, and a couple for over a century. The newest kids on the block, Telsa and the like, arose from the either as single-purpose car builders. That doesn’t mean there isn’t room for more at the table, and there’s plenty of brands out there that could easily jump into the car biz, but which one would you like to see do it?
Sears and Sowbuck used to be an easy choice, and the formerly giant retailer at one time actually sold cars and motorcycles under their Allstate brand. But what about a corporate behemoth without a history of car crafting? Microsoft has been providing Ford with in-car electronics for a couple of years now, maybe it’s time for them to take a crack at the whole lasagna. That would be 1337. Alternatively, you old school computer geeks may jones for a Commodore Car, that is if Holden doesn’t mind.
And there’s a slew of brands outside of the world of hard goods to consider. Would a Gap Car fill a niche? Would a Bank of American Motors interest you? How about if the Cheesecake Factory served up generously sized sedans along with their generously sized portions?
Whatever the brand, the possibilities are endless, and with many today’s car companies dead or on the ropes, somebody is going to have to step up and fulfill the pent-up demand once the economy starts firing on all cylinders instead of just firing workers.
So, which would it be, what brand would you like to see build a car, and why? And if you’re rally passionate about it, what would they make and what would the cars be called?
NBC Used Cars; If you haven’t driven it, it’s new to you!
Image sources: [muscle-cars.blogspot.com, rewardsdirect.com]

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  1. engineerd Avatar

    Since Dyson was already taken, I'm going to go with Home Depot. I imagine it being utilitarian, able to carry 4×8 plywood, and easily fixable and/or modifiable with anything from your local Home Depot store. In fact, you can sit down with a flooring consultant to customize your interior.

    1. MarionCobretti Avatar
      MarionCobretti

      Nice. But I fear I wouldn't be able to find anything and would have to ask someone for help every time I drove it. "Oh, yes, sir, gears 1-6 are up here with hardware, but reverse is 12 aisles over near our storage solutions. Oh, what's that, the brakes? That's not my department…let me page someone for you."

  2. Jeff Glucker Avatar
    Jeff Glucker

    Apple.
    It would be expensive, but sell quite well. It would have a beautiful exterior style. It would be sleek and fast. The only problem would be that the fuel used would be hard to find in most areas, causing the car to occasionally run like crap.

    1. Alff Avatar

      You wouldn't be able to buy aftermarket spares, either.

      1. BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ Avatar
        BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ

        Apple approved tires only, 200/63-17.5 OS11

      2. MarionCobretti Avatar
        MarionCobretti

        Heck, they'd probably periodically release updates that broke the interface with other suppliers' gas pumps, only allowing you to buy gasoline for it at the iFuel store. The fuel would, of course, be equipped with PRM (Petroleum Rights Management), so you wouldn't be able to siphon it out and use it in your lawn mower.
        The SatNav would also refuse to guide you to any sex shop, brothel, or adult theater. And despite being assembled from mostly off the shelf hardware, it would cost twice as much as a comparable vehicle from a different manufacturer.

      3. MarionCobretti Avatar
        MarionCobretti

        Heck, they'd probably periodically release updates that broke the interface with other suppliers' gas pumps, only allowing you to buy gasoline for it at the iFuel store. The fuel would, of course, be equipped with PRM (Petroleum Rights Management), so you wouldn't be able to siphon it out and use it in your lawn mower.
        The SatNav would also refuse to guide you to any sex shop, brothel, or adult theater. And despite being assembled from mostly off the shelf hardware, it would cost twice as much as a comparable vehicle from a different manufacturer.

    2. tonyola Avatar

      Steve Jobs would have to personally approve any modifications made to the car, otherwise, Apple sends out an electronic signal "boat-anchoring" the car. Be careful about hanging that pine-tree air freshener from your mirror. Oh, and don't even think about installing an Apple engine in a non-Apple car unless you like unsocial visits from the Apple legal team. You did read the fine print on the End-Driver's License Agreement (EDLA), didn't you?

      1. ptschett Avatar

        And spy photographers beware, lest you find yourself coming home from a nice dinner to a house full of policemen and conspicuously short on computers.

    3. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

      or require service appointments where the technicians look down on you for typical use.

    4. chrystlubitshi Avatar
      chrystlubitshi

      so, no turn signals? the people driving them would, of course, want them… but we all know Lord Job's opinion on FLASH. flash is bad… he wouldn't make a vehicle that would allow flash to run… it kills the battery. and.. as all of us city drivers know, flashers are waaaaaay out of style/outdated…

      1. mdharrell Avatar

        No, it would have turn signals. It's just that, as is true for most Bugs, it wouldn't distinguish between left-click and right-click.
        <img src="http://members.trainorders.com/android/VW09/BajaSpeedoLEDsNight.jpg&quot; width="300" />

    5. discontinuuity Avatar

      That "one button" feature will make it a real bitch to drive.

    6. AteUpWithMotor Avatar
      AteUpWithMotor

      iCar! I think it would probably look a lot like a smart fortwo, though.

    7. Alff Avatar

      In the U.S., it would only operate on congested roads.

    8. jjd241 Avatar

      You could also only have it serviced by official Apple technicians and use OEM parts. No after market parts would work, and having anyone but Apple open the hood would void the warranty.

  3. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

    Ikea cars… Swedish design, easy to assemble or disassemble, infinitely hackable…

    1. m4ff3w Avatar
      m4ff3w

      Doesn't that define (older) Volvos already?

    2. Alff Avatar

      A fully fitted repair shop would consist of an allen wrench.

    3. m4ff3w Avatar
      m4ff3w

      Doesn't that define (older) Volvos already?

  4. dukeisduke Avatar

    The Sears Allstate was a badge-engineered Kaiser Henry J.

    1. mdharrell Avatar

      Sears was in the automobile business long before that, though:
      http://searsmotorbuggy.com/Sears_history.php

  5. BGW Avatar

    Chrysler.

    1. rikadyn Avatar

      My first thought as well, It's kinda sad to lose a car company to making appliances…

  6. Jim Brennan Avatar
    Jim Brennan

    This is a very interesting question, only I don't see a non car brand ever gearing up to produce cars. And here's why: Its not a part of their core purpose.
    A Couple of examples: Greyhound Corporation spun off the company that inspired the name, Greyhound Lines in 1987. Greyhound Corporation found the bus lines to be money losers, but kept the name until it re-named itself the Dial Cororation in 1990.
    Chris-Craft Industries used to produce some of the best boats in the world, but became more of a broadcasting company, owning a number of stations, until it merged with News Corporation.
    So, a profitable company has to be completly out of its mind to get into the world of vehicle manufacturing and sales.

    1. Manic_King Avatar

      I don't know, maybe it's like any other start-up situation. All the manufacturers have started somewhere, huge Asian trading houses/multi branch companies (Mitsubishi, Fuji heavy ind, Hyundai etc.) decided to get into car business couple of decades ago and are still producing cars + all kind of other things from chemicals to TV sets to oil tankers.
      Anyway, Sony car could be interesting. Or Philips, or Siemens.

    2. tonyola Avatar

      Greyhound only operates the bus fleet – they haven't actually made a bus in over a half century. The buses are mostly made by MCI and Prevost.

  7. tonyola Avatar

    Lockheed-Martin. Put all that fighter and aerospace experience and technology to make an ultra-strong, ultra-light, ultra-advanced supercar. Sure, it would be military-budget expensive, but it would be a great American finger in the face to Ferrari, Bugatti, and McLaren. Plus it would be completely invisible to radar.

    1. Smells_Homeless Avatar

      And likely drive-by-wire. Eww.

  8. tenbeers Avatar

    Oshkosh.
    Hey, they don't make cars.

  9. RJC Avatar
    RJC

    Nobody else wants a Red Bull car? I imagine if Red Bull would turn out a car it'd be a lot like a Local Motors street car – fast, purpose-built, aggressively styled and engineered, and mega mega fun.d

    1. smokyburnout Avatar

      Just as long as they don't use Renault engines.
      <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v648/smokyburnout/red-bull-inline.jpg"&gt;

  10. Josh Avatar
    Josh

    Dont know if this qualifies but I would love to see what Ducati could build.

    1. Black Steelies Avatar

      KTM did. yea sure, why not.
      I imagine other bikes as cars. A Harley would be a bloated classic land yacht for old timers trying to relive the past…

  11. discontinuuity Avatar

    I'd buy a Suzuki if their cars were anything like their bikes.

    1. Dr_Dangerously Avatar

      Only thing from Suzuki I want is the Pikes Peak Escudo/XL7

    1. Tim Odell Avatar
      Tim Odell

      Awesome!

  12. Tripl3fast Avatar

    I could see General Electric dipping a toe in the auto waters. With the jet engines and generators things. Kinda like the Saab story.
    A out of left field choice would be Folgers Coffee. Just don't call it a Bean.

  13. Alff Avatar

    The Sybian car offers good vibrations.

  14. Slow Joe Crow Avatar
    Slow Joe Crow

    Based on names, and intended uses of their current products, how about some bicycle companies. Redline would obviously make sports cars, while Surly would be ideally suited to minivans, taxis and small delivery vehicles. And given that they already make a bike called the "hand job" imagine what sort of names Cove would come up with. In the same vein the Transition Dirtbag could become a pickup trike as well as a dirt jump bike.

    1. discontinuuity Avatar

      I imagine the Surly Large Marge as the equivalent to a purpose-built off-roader, like the Jeep Rubicon.

  15. VeeArrrSix Avatar

    Fairchild – Republic.

  16. ptschett Avatar

    I was going to say Yamaha, but I'd failed to do the research. Given what it looked like, I think I'd have been happier not knowing.
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/39/Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg/320px-Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg"/&gt;

  17. ptschett Avatar

    I was going to say Yamaha, but I'd failed to do the research. Given what it looked like, I think I'd have been happier not knowing.
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/39/Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg/320px-Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg"/&gt;

  18. ptschett Avatar

    I was going to say Yamaha, but I'd failed to do the research. Given what it looked like, I think I'd have been happier not knowing.
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/39/Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg/320px-Yamaha_OX99-11_front.jpg"/&gt;

    1. discontinuuity Avatar

      Well, they built the SHO engine and quite a few other limited-production engines.

      1. tonyola Avatar

        Yamaha also had a big role in the development and construction of the Toyota 2000GT.

  19. Bill Avatar
    Bill

    Hmm…
    Not a tech company… Google is cool, but they do software type stuff, hardware is not their thing.
    I liked the IKEA idea, simple, relatively easy to construct.
    Perhaps Lego, a car made of interlocking metal bricks… could be fun.
    I would like to see a car made by an old school tool manufacturer, like Lie Nielson. Not Lie Nielsen itself, being a woodowrking tool company. I think a tool company would be able to make something that suits its purpose with no extra frills.
    Maybe I just need a pickup truck.

  20. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    I was nearly stumped on this one, and my first answer [any gun mfg'er] was taken. So I went on to think of any non-car product that's served me particularly well over the last few years…
    Lenovo.
    Hooniverse is administered (not hosted) from one of 2 Thinkpads. My personal machine is a T42p from 2005, which lasted perfectly until late last year when the backlight, then fan failed. Replaced both of those and it's still going strong. That's after 2 years of backpack and outdoor use. The thing's handsome in a purposeful way and a perfect mix of indestructibly and repairable.

    1. Tripl3fast Avatar

      I love my T60 from about the same year maybe a little newer. I take it out on weekends, after a tune up( MS Updates) from sitting around for a while and a battery charge. It is not my daily driver, but I just love taking it out. It has both IBM and Lenovo branding too. I ignore the fact they are a Chinese product now.

      1. Thrashy Avatar

        My T61p has fizzled on me twice, and is now a paerweight. But that's not Lenovo's fault so much as it is NVidia's for manufacturing faulty video chips. That laptop was rock-solid otherwise.

      2. Tim Odell Avatar
        Tim Odell

        Hell, mine was shipped from China even back in '05.
        Thinkpads are my Exhibit A of what the Chinese can do, engineering-wise when they're properly overseen and committed to quality. I'm pretty sure I could crack a macbook in half with either of my T-s

    2. citroen67 Avatar

      +one meeeeellion for the Lenovo love! I have a T61 that is just the shit! It's nice to know that in a land of Apple-humpers…there are still a few people that know what a good quality computer is made of.

  21. Bill Avatar
    Bill

    Dyson…their vacuums are really good, and their understanding of airflow, and electric motors could produce an interesting car…and if their new fan is any indication, imagine what the Climate Control and air vents would look like…haha.
    Bose has stepped into automotive suspensions, and made a Lexus jump…I'm sure they could design an interesting car, and it should have a great exhaust note…

    1. engineerd Avatar

      I was going to say Dyson, as well. He's willing to look at things a different way and think out of the box. It would be interesting to see what they would come up with.

    2. Joshvar Avatar
      Joshvar

      Bose is the equivalent of a fart can – all show (bass/treble) no go (midrange, definition, dynamics, transient response, and on and on). They occasionally get something right, but even being an ardent non-audiophile, I can't stand the sound they put out (I've put up with it in 2 cars so far, but it was due to packages).
      To bring it back to what car they'd make, a Bose would have good styling, a solid feel to the doors, sound like <insert favorite engine sound here, because it would be user selectable>, but have the interior of an 80s Cavalier or Escort, a muffled-to-silence 3 cylinder from a Geo Metro with 200k on the clock with "MarketingFriendly Engine Sound Projection," and the crashworthiness of a Big Wheel.

    3. Alff Avatar

      A Dyson car would suck.

    4. pdb Avatar
      pdb

      God no. Dyson is plastic, gimmicky junk compared to a real commercial quality vacuum.

  22. Tomsk Avatar

    How about a KFC Double-Down-mobile? "So much engine, we didn't have room for a body!"
    A Nintendo car would also be interesting.

    1. bzr Avatar

      The door panels are made of fried chicken, and the fuel tank is filled with something called "Colonel's Sauce." Also, the headliner is made of bacon.

  23. muthalovin Avatar

    Virgin.
    Not sure why, but I figure they already got a space-plane, so a car would be a natural extension of that.

    1. Thrashy Avatar

      Expanding on this, I bet Scaled Composites could make one hell of a kit car.

  24. Joshvar Avatar
    Joshvar

    id Software, primarily John Carmack. The dude's a performance/efficiency maniac (cars, computers, code, space shuttles, anything that goes), but also very pragmatic in his approach and would likely do things in a way that no one else would (for better or worse). It would just take long enough to come out that by the time it did, the hype train would have clean run it over.

  25. Alff Avatar

    Anhui, Great Wall Motor, Jiangxi or BYD.

  26. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

    Let's not forget charging $500 to change the start battery out…

    1. BGW Avatar

      "I'm sorry sir, but cracked windshields are not covered by Genius Service."

  27. P161911 Avatar

    Ruger. It would be ugly and heavy, but probably pretty fast, be built like a tank, cheap and last forever.
    Craftsman, but only if it has the hand tools warranty, not the power tools warranty. You could drive it off a cliff, drag it back to the store and they give you a new one.

    1. mdharrell Avatar

      Ruger built two prototype automobiles. They were variously referred to as Ruger Specials or Ruger Sports Tourers and were pretty much as you described, other than the cheap part.
      <img src="http://www.cyberattic.com/stores/carstuff/items/461705/catphoto.jpg&quot; width="300" />

      1. P161911 Avatar

        I remembers something about that. I had little luck finding any info other than "styled like a 1930s car, but with modern handling (for 1970). I was thinking it was more like a replica Model A, but it appears to be much better.

        1. mdharrell Avatar

          My understanding is that he was inspired by his love of Bentleys.

  28. Bill Avatar
    Bill

    Peterbilt would make a sweet car, it would be a mix between a Bugatti, 32 Ford, and Rolls Royce. But it would have a 500 horse Caterpillar engine and 13 speed transmission.
    It be a mass produced verison of the Blastolene B702, but with a better looking grill.

  29. BGW Avatar

    The Google Car can't be far off, can it? I'm sure it'll be free, aesthetically pleasing, well-built, safe, efficient while offering great performance and come with a fully-customizable range of options for no added cost.
    However, by default, it has a very annoying buzz which is hard to turn off and forces you to follow certain other drivers around and a nonstop stream of location-aware ads every time you look out the windshield.

    1. AteUpWithMotor Avatar
      AteUpWithMotor

      SAIC just announced that its Roewe 350 (their first clean-sheet design, not a knockoff of an old Rover) will be the first car with Android.http://www.autozine.org/Archive/SAIC/new/Roewe_35

  30. nofrillls Avatar
    nofrillls

    I've always wondered why Kawasaki, of all major Japanese motorcycle manufacturers, never venture towards building cars. I've imagined them producing something like a world-beating performance subcompact (and most likely, debuting in lime green).
    Also, I've pondered what type of automotive monstrosity Vincent might have produced…Something like a <a href>"http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://bringatrailer.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/1932_Morgan_Super_Sports_Three_Wheeler_Trike_JAP_Motor_Front_1.JPG&imgrefurl=http://bringatrailer.com/2009/02/03/3-wheel-motion-1932-morgan-super-sport-trike/&usg=__1GNv8TaegTGAdrAFZx7RKjCd7Nw=&h=319&w=480&sz=43&hl=en&start=41&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=9IEoDYsqIeF3RM:&tbnh=86&tbnw=129&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dcar%2Bexternal%2Bv-twin%26start%3D40%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1">Morgan SS, only with an air-cooled, pushrod V8 hanging off the front-end.

    1. nofrillls Avatar
      nofrillls

      D'Oh! HTML fail.

  31. vwminispeedster Avatar
    vwminispeedster

    Weber, charcoal powered.

    1. mdharrell Avatar

      Stick with VW for charcoal power. Pretty sure it isn't Weber-equipped, though:
      <img src="http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i290/mungopw/bugwood.gif&quot; width="300" />

      1. Black Steelies Avatar

        Kingsford charcoal has close ties with Fomoco.
        The company began by turning all the old body scraps from a Ford plant into charcoal.

  32. Lotte Avatar
    Lotte

    Lifestyles. It'd be both fun and safe, and be available with a, um, manual transmission.

  33. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    I was nearly stumped on this one, and my first answer [any gun mfg'er] was taken. So I went on to think of any non-car product that's served me particularly well over the last few years…
    Lenovo.
    Hooniverse is administered (not hosted) from one of 2 Thinkpads. My personal machine is a T42p from 2005, which lasted perfectly until late last year when the backlight, then fan failed. Replaced both of those and it's still going strong. That's after 2 years of backpack and outdoor use. The thing's handsome in a purposeful way and a perfect mix of indestructibly and repairable.

  34. dmilligan Avatar

    Bang and Olufsen.
    Just imagine how strange a car could be.

  35. MarionCobretti Avatar
    MarionCobretti

    At first I was thinking of Ubuntu, since Shuttleworth has the bucks to make it happen the idea of an open-source, community developed, hackable car appeals to me. But that's pretty much the idea behind Local Motors. Plus, they'd probably put the damned transmission lever on the sill to the driver's left in the new model, ignoring user feedback.
    So how about Target? Given their focus on low cost coupled with style, they might make something interesting. Plus, the current corporation is descended from the Dayton-Hudson corporation, and the idea of a modern Hudson appeals to me.

  36. citroen67 Avatar

    I wanna see a car made by Harbor Freight! It would be the best Chi-com technology available. But, it would have to have an uber-American style name to go along with the "Pittsburg, U.S. General and Chicago Pneumatic.

  37. pdb Avatar
    pdb

    Kawasaki.

  38. Tomsk Avatar

    Just thought of another one: Kellogg's!
    Poor milk in a special reservoir to enhance the driving experience, but don't wait too long to drive it or it'll make a Buick LeSabre seem like a Se7en by comparison.

  39. wipo90 Avatar
    wipo90

    Carlsberg – Probably the Best Car in the World
    no really I love Carlsberg, and "green" cars are on its way =)
    Maybe they would run on Ethanol too …
    http://s.bebo.com/app-image/7926585432/5411656627

  40. smokyburnout Avatar

    Ironic answers:
    Pep Boys. Tons of customizability from the factory,. but it's all plastic stick-on crap.
    Serious answer:
    Sony. It'd only be available in Japan and it'd have all these crazy gadgets on it. It would also be overpriced, use a ton of proprietary, incompatible fluids, and it wouldn't sell very well, but I would still want one.
    Also, I want a motorcycle by Encom.

  41. 99Miata/09STI Avatar
    99Miata/09STI

    Red Bull
    I haven't read through all the comments so I apologize if they were already suggested.
    They could use some of what they are learning in F1. I suppose all their cars should come with wings?

  42. Cruising Avatar
    Cruising

    Imagine if Alan Mulally goes back to Boeing and request them to build a car.
    I could see them build some type of small hatches, larger wagons and mini-vans with many engine options and interior options.