Last Call- Low Down Dirty Shame Edition

Lower your car
When it comes to ride height you have three options. Obviously you can go with stock… if you’re a loser. Or, you can go high-boy or low rider, depending on your proclivities. Considering all three of those options, it’s really only the last one that also allows for inventive methods of traversing real life.
Last Call indicates the end of Hooniverse’s broadcast day. It’s meant to be an open forum for anyone and anything. Thread jacking is not only accepted, it’s encouraged. 
Image: Go Away Garage

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  1. stigshift Avatar

    Because having a high performance all-wheel-drive vehicle that can't clear a suburban driveway is just SO much cooler than a usable WRX. People worry me…

    1. Batshitbox Avatar

      New Jersey plates. Get it?

  2. JayP2112 Avatar

    Got the teeshirt.
    With the slicks I drag the torque limiter bolts and the first flex connector out the drive. I can get it out on planks and takes 10 mins. I can't drive it back up and end up changing to the streets out in the street. Because racercar I guess.

  3. Tiller188 Avatar

    "Considering all three of those options, it’s really only the last one that also allows for inventive methods of traversing real life.".
    Well, sort of, but there's a BIG difference between "allows for" and "requires". (I'd also argue that a highboy setup is more likely to "allow for" inventive methods of traversing real life…or at least curbs.)

    1. Felis_Concolor Avatar

      . . . and that's what I loved about borrowing a friend's US model Renault Le Car/5: when your suspension is supple enough to handle pyramidal center strips without dragging the exhaust system, traffic jams on major thoroughfares become entertaining exercises in creative thruway explorations.

  4. Marto Avatar

    Beyond concept cars. Do you have an artist you like who does "vision cars"? I (like everyone else) loves Daniel Simon's stuff. And I have just stumbled across someone called 600V from DeviantArt.
    What do you think?
    <img src="; width="600">
    <img src="; width="600">
    <img src="; width="600">

    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      The Tuesday answer is Oberdan Bezzi

    2. Fuhrman16 Avatar

      That C.O.E. So much want!

  5. Wildcat_445 Avatar

    Jeesh! A car slung that low would never make it down a Michigan road. Would we have to stop every three blocks and have it lifted out of a 1-inch-deep pothole?
    On the plus side, some mammoth Hummer type thingie with monster wheels could probably drive right over it and not even touch the roof.

  6. Maymar Avatar

    /Lowers car for better cornering.
    /Has to inch around the corner into every parking lot.
    I am perpetually annoyed by shitty old quasi-stanced hooptie-grade Civics and Accords getting in my way.

  7. Devin Avatar

    Is this obnoxious?
    <img src="; width="500">
    I think it might be a bit obnoxious. They also seem to have wrecked the grille.
    <img src="; width="500">
    And I liked how the current Ram looked. Why are they ruining it?

    1. BlackIce_GTS Avatar

      Because Chrysler.
      "Am I doing it right?
      How about now?"

    2. Felis_Concolor Avatar

      The emblematiasis modern domestic pickup trucks suffer from is nothing compared to their headlight overload. Holy Dekotora Batman: those LED arrays surrounding the projector lamps are overwhelming my photochromic mirrors, to say nothing of the visual assault they commit upon oncoming traffic.

    3. ptschett Avatar

      I can't hate the tailgate letters. They make me nostalgic for old pickups.
      <img src="; width="500"/>
      I don't like this particular grille, but I kinda like the Rebel's. Ford gets away with something like 8 grilles, looks like DodgeRam wants to get in on that kind of fun?

    4. racer139 Avatar

      RAM has nostrils now. It can breathe. WTF.

  8. SpiroAgnew76 Avatar

    <img src="; width="600">
    I need a F-body now.

  9. ptschett Avatar

    Slight tangent (Two Wheel Thursday?) since I'm thinking about getting back into the motorcycle world* in the next few years:
    I don't understand the appeal of a low-riding motorcycle as found in most cruiser-type bikes.
    If you happen to be something like 5'0" [1524 mm] tall, are a beginning rider, and want the security of putting both feet down at a stop, OK I can see that in that circumstance. But I don't understand why so much of the motorcycle market seems to be targeted to 5th-percentile riders.
    For me, I'm 6' tall, corpulentbig-boned, and want a seat to pegs relationship that caters more toward the 50th-to-95th percentile ridership than to the 5th-to-50th. I put 40,000 miles on a KLR650 from 2005-2010 (with a 10,000 mile season in '09) and felt scrunched up even on that tall-person-friendly bike on longer rides; and if that wasn't a tall enough bike, I installed raising links in the rear suspension to adjust the suspension geometry and spring rate to suit its having me as the rider.
    *this might happen to follow from my particular automotive heresy, where the difference from a manual-transmission to an automatic-transmission car is several orders of magnitude less significant to me than the difference between a motorcycle and a car

    1. Batshitbox Avatar

      I rode a DR650 for a couple weeks and was surprised at the "scrunchy" seating position. Even with my pretty normal inseam, the seat height of a full sized 80/20 dual sport was tippy-toe territory, yet I was looking at my knees when my feet were on the pegs. My DRZ400 is similar, I think I just wasn't used to dirt bike ergonomics.
      My 6' house mate has the same trouble as you. Curiously, he fits well on his BMW R1200C, which is a cruiser, albeit a German cruiser. His Triumph Thunderbird seems to fit okay, and is less of a cruiser.
      The GS1100ES was a great bike for the big. A really long chassis and tall wheels, from when Suzuki was big in drag racing. Good luck finding something like that now, but I knew some 250 lb riders that were a head taller than me (boys and girls!) that loved them.
      I think you're destined for a 20/80 "adventure sport" like a Triumph Tiger or Kawasaki Versys. Try the European bikes, they seem to be made with beanpoles in mind.

    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      If you want a "standard" motorcycle, the CB1100 definitely has your name on it. For a mid-size bike, look at the CB500F and FZ-07. They both seem to fit taller riders well. If you have bucks to burn and want to go in the other direction, there's always the Valkyrie.

      1. Batshitbox Avatar

        Ermagarrd! The brought back the Valkyrie?!? WANT.
        Too bad they went full retard on the styling. Did they hire BMW for that part or what?
        <img src="; width=400>
        That headlight nacelle… reminds me of a pigeon taking a nap.

        1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
          Peter Tanshanomi

          It looks much better in person. And, I have ridden it; regardless of the styling, it is a phenomenal ride. SOOO wantable.

        2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
          Peter Tanshanomi

          With the side-mounted radiators, there was only so much they could do, so I'm okay with the direction they went. It looks best in the "Buick LeSabre" maroon. Unfortunately, the ABS version is only available in black.
          <img src="; width="580">

  10. Preludacris Avatar

    Further to recent Chevy Colorado discussion:
    I parked by it again today. I thought the comparison to the S-10 was a good photo opportunity. It's in a different category than the S-10, but not as big as I thought. Up close, you realize the perception of size comes partly from styling. Like the huge wheel gap, and the high hood line made more imposing by a very low air dam. The truck appears to have very good ground clearance, but anybody going off road regularly will be removing that air dam, probably to the detriment of fuel economy. As I mentioned, the bed sides are high, but I could reach the bed floor (I'm 6'1").
    <img src="; width="600">
    Slightly bigger photo here:

    1. Batshitbox Avatar

      Whoah… the S-10 looks like a Caprice-amino near that thing.
      The extra-cab S-10 seems (and I know it's partly the strong vertical of the tree) to have a longer wheelbase than the crew cab Colorado.
      That air dam is just offsetting the drag from the enormous wheel gaps.
      That sloped windshield and boxy hood make the Colorado a maneater. You could hide your Prelude out there in front. See how the S-10 driver sits closer to the firewall, and has a sloping hood to see over? The Colorado has the reverse: an upright grille and a sloping windshield. Farcockt.
      Why we get cars that try to be trucks and trucks that try to be cars?

      1. Preludacris Avatar

        Maybe it's because this way we get a bigger, tougher looking truck that still gets exactly the same fuel economy as the S-10 did?

        1. Batshitbox Avatar

          If it's all the same, I'll take the one I can see out of, and can put a motorcycle in the bed of. I'm sure the A-pillars on the Colorado meet a higher 'safety' standard, too.

          1. Preludacris Avatar

            I hear ya.