It’s almost time to tell the tale of John Bronco

The greatest pitchman who ever lived wasn’t trying to sell you on rich Corinthian leather. This isn’t a story about some random Joe and his Isuzus. And despite his dulcet tones, Don Draper and his Benz ads have got nothing on the original superstar vehicle sales hero. Sadly though, there’s a good chance you haven’t heard about him because his story has been lost to time. But now is when we change that. This is the story of John Bronco.

Here’s a brief look at Bronco’s history, at least what we know, directly from the website JohnBronco.com:

Some have said that if you were famous before the internet, you might as well never have existed. Such is the case for John Bronco, the greatest pitchman who ever lived. In 1966, Ford tapped him to race their new prototype SUV at the Baja 500 in Mexico. Not only did he win, but he gave a rousing speech that rallied a nation. Legend has it that Ford named the new car “Bronco” after John, made him the face of their campaign and skyrocketed him to stardom.

His commercials were on every channel and his jingle went triple-platinum. John launched his own cologne,
breakfast cereal, video game, action figure, you name it. He was the very embodiment of the American dream,
that is, until it all came crashing down.

Per Driving, the teaser was created to support a 37-minute mockumentary originally slated for release in April. That would’ve been at the Tribeca Film festival. Obviously that didn’t happen, and now we’re left wondering more about John Bronco. The always excellent Walton Goggins portrays Bronco while Dennis Quaid. Seriously, this looks like it could be absolutely hilarious and I hope we get to see the full-length version soon.

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11 responses to “It’s almost time to tell the tale of John Bronco”

  1. 0A5599 Avatar
    0A5599

    So you’re saying that the most notorious Bronco pitchman EVER sort of disappeared for a few years?

    https://uploads.metropoles.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/20124137/O-J-05-GettyImages-168799032.jpg

  2. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    I’m certain this is a clever piece of Ford marketing, so the full length version has to be released prior to the Bronco hitting showrooms.

    1. Jeff Glucker Avatar
      Jeff Glucker

      I’m totally fine with that because the parties involved mean it will be actually funny. Walton Goggins is hilarious

  3. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    Speaking as a child of the ’70s I can tell you it’s likely that John Bronco:
    O.D.’d on quaaludes and Seagram’s 7, or
    Was brainwashed by the Moonies, or the Krishnas, or
    Died in a death-cult mass suicide, or
    Died of AIDS before his publicist adopted a new social attitude, or
    Recorded a disco version of “Subterranean Homesick Blues” and was shunned forevermore, or
    Moved back to Ottowa and had a nervous breakdown, or
    Some other stupid ’70s cliche thing happened to him, whatever.

    Speaking as a child of the ’70s, and owner of an Econoline, I’ll let Mike Watt say it for me

    1. Jeff Glucker Avatar
      Jeff Glucker

      Young Eddie Vedder just up there killing it and Watt’s bass sounds great

      1. Batshitbox Avatar
        Batshitbox

        Watt’s voice has a heck of a lot of twang in it for a kid from San Pedro.

    2. Wayne Moyer Avatar
      Wayne Moyer

      You forgot got a truckers license and lived on the road for the rest of his life.

    3. Lokki Avatar
      Lokki

      Speaking as a child of the 70’s, I seem to remember a commercial with him driving his Bronco down Abbey Road and then through some strawberry fields, but was weird because it was all filmed in some sort of purple haze. It shook me. It shook me all night long.

    4. dead_elvis, inc. Avatar
      dead_elvis, inc.

      One of my favorite tracks, from a stellar album.

    5. dead_elvis, inc. Avatar
      dead_elvis, inc.

      One of my favorite tracks, from a stellar album.

  4. dead_elvis, inc. Avatar
    dead_elvis, inc.

    The always excellent Walton Goggins portrays Bronco while Dennis Quaid.

    Well, that’s not confusing or