By Jeff Glucker
Are you on the hunt for the perfect piece of furniture to spruce up your sitting area? You have a sitting area, right? Of course you do! And we’ve found the perfect table to compliment your many leather-bound books, your crystal goblets of expensive liquor, and your fancy well-trained dogs wearing fancy well-trained haircuts. It’s from a company called Discommon, and it features the shape of an Aston Martin Valkyrie set in the middle.
It will only cost you $17,000.
This table is one in a ten-piece run of tables designed to feature unique or memorable automobiles. Here is number eight in the run, which also includes a Ferrari F40 table, Ford GT table, Concorde plane table, Lamborghini Miura, and more. Discommon says tables start at $20,000… despite the Aston Martin table starting at $17,000.
Perhaps there’s been a bit of a market downturn for insanely priced custom tables?
What makes this one so expensive? This one is handcrafted from solid walnut while the legs are machine aerospace-grade aluminum. It’s four feet long and four inches thick. And in the middle is that admittedly cool Aston Martin Valkyrie bit of art. It’s called the Wake coffee table, because the car appears to be ripping through the air creating a wake behind it.
There’s no question it’s beautiful. There’s no way we expect anyone who also doesn’t own a real Valkyrie to own one. Or perhaps Aston Martin would purchase one for its corporate offices back in Gaydon.
If you do want something handcrafted from Discommon, they have more affordable items.
Maybe a $110 bottle opener is more your speed?
Or not.
Given how many items are listed as sold out, the prices are surely not high enough. Nice when you control supply, even negligible demand will suffice.
Ring time?
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“Can we offer you this artisan defibrillator with your table?”
The table has a drain under the car – just put a bucket under it.
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Yowza. This is almost certainly a CNC woodworking product, and it’s not even one single piece of wood. It’s beautiful, yes, but also sort of flashy. A good fit for the supercar crowd?
A wildly expensive table with a significant portion of unusable-for-typical-table-activities surface? Absolutely.
Filed to: looks great, no danger of me ever needing to worry about experiencing it.
I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to have a vehicle up on blocks inside the house again.
Simple. A lot of your rolling stock is small enough to fit on a table. Stick one of the microcars on top of some garage sale furniture and say, “Honey, I just gained a parking space and saved us $16,950!”
I should probably wait to try that until after I’ve removed at least most of the larger car parts from the library, the living room, the spare bedroom, the second bathroom, her craft room…
If I’m going to have a gearhead coffee table I’d sooner have an engine block
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or F! wheel.
For the sort of people that can view every Petrolicious article/video without a hint of irony. Likely has a collection of windup mechanical wrist jewelry that cost more than most folks project cars, or even regular cars.
Cost me $17,000? No. No it won’t cost me $17,000.
“
DonnyElon, please.”As a guy who used to work for a company that made expensive toy cars and now works for a company that makes commercial furniture, including table tops cut on a CNC machine, I find this… ridiculous.
Not as ridiculous as a company that specializes in cool design naming itself something that looks like “Disco Mom” when you read it too fast.
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“Cool design” is relative, but I like the random polka dots and their contrast.