“This is OnStar Emergency, have you just been in an accident?”
“Yes, I am a vehicle porter for a GM plant and I just crashed this minty-fresh Malibu. I was loading it onto a freight train and I decided to ram the train going 35 mph… what should I do?”
“Blame it on Toyota?”
Updated!
I was just emailed some carnage-laden photos of a fresh-off-the-line Chevrolet Malibu. It seems an overzealous lot porter experienced some inexperienced acceleration straight into a freight train.
Let the caption action begin!
Update from the source’s source: (this is still a rumor at this point)
Official story is that it was being delivered to the train and the employee dropped the manifest in the floor and was picking it up, then hit the train in an unlit area.
Truth is that the employee was actually taking it to the QwikTrip and was texting, got to an unlit crossing but red lights were flashing and hit a flat bed train car that was stopped. The train started backing up and spun him out from underneath
Thanks to MissMotorMouth for the heads-up on this one! Head to her site for a bit more info http://missmotormouth.com/2010/02/what-happens-when-malibu-meets-train/
By Jeff Glucker
Jeff Glucker is the co-founder and Executive Editor of Hooniverse.com. He’s often seen getting passed as he hustles a 1991 Mitsubishi Montero up the 405 Freeway. IG: @HooniverseJeff
Kamil Kaluski
The first step should be to recall all Malibu's, then insted of fixing the problem they should just send them all to the crusher and refund all the owners.
Mabee we will start hearing of unintended acceleration problems with the malibu now.
This car obviously ran into Chuck Norris in a crosswalk.
Just curious…Where are the airbags?
This Malibu was born a Malibu with the heart of a Corvette. Sadly, things didn't work out so well.
The Malibu-V, now THAT would be a sneaky engine swap though you might want to swap the go-wheels to the back or you would torque steer your arms into mush
They already sell a 5.3L powered Impala, meaning you could probably cram that FWD powertrain into the Malibu.
No reason you couldn't put a 6.2L or 7.0L in place of that 5.3.
No reason aside from that fact that you'd liquefy the tranny the second you hit the gas.
Liquefied Tranny! That's something you don't hear every day.
Nope. Just every other day.
Sounds like a good name for a band.
Murilee, your next band name.
My first thoughts. The front looks very Corvette-ish smashed up. Especially around that broken headlight area.
This Malibu will be up for auction alongside Tiger's smashed up Escalade.
The UAW still has a way to go to improving work conditions at this plant.
no big deal. not like anyone was waiting for that car to be delivered anyways.
But now Enterprise will be short a car on my next vacation!
Just another botched Malibu nose job.
Who says the Malibu isn't a viable competitor to the Camry?
L@@K!!!!!! CHEAP MALIBU!!SUPER LOW MILES!!OMG!!
You will never find a car as new as this one! Low miles, never driven from the dealership!
Slight front-end damage, maybe just a new hood and bumper. We might have one around back.
YOU CAN'T PASS UP THIS DEAL!
Fortinet does not block Hooniverse at work anymore! Hooray!
So… Brand new Malibu eh? Judging by the rust on the brakes already, I’d say its about 2 hours old.
Hey look, someone found a way to improve the look of a Malibu!
When an object is in motion, it will stay in motion until it runs into a freight train. . .or something
Ah… Lutz's 135th Law of Motion
This Malibu was born a Malibu with the heart of a Corvette. Sadly, things didn't work out so well.
Humph. Tweaks the emotions about as much as seeing a dryer that got pushed off the loading dock then backed into by a forklift.
very nice!
ok! very good!
wonderful!
thank you!
Good, yours articles is very nice!
good
good
It packs a high-protein punch, and is sure to satisfy
stab in the back, on a show that’s been a revolving door for attackers calling Howard K. Stern every name in the book.
good
amazing! way to go!