Hooniverse Asks- What's a Good Un-Used Real Thing Car Name?

By Robert Emslie Aug 6, 2010


TSX, SL500, 300C, Venza, Impreza, the list goes on. Some say all the good real-world names are gone, just like there are no original movie plots any more. I say, they’re just not trying hard enough. I’m also getting pretty sick and tire of all the made up names blighting everything from the little pills that help us make sexy time more enjoyable to the cars that our partners in that activity drive home in after completing the walk of shame. I think we can do better, and there’s nobody better to come up with awesome product names that you fine folks.

Let’s stick to cars here, after all  this is a car blog, and see if you can think up some killer labels that are actual things -whether animal, vegetable or mineral – that really exist. Some makers convolute real words to make new ones that have no real meaning, but evoke some sort of emotional response based on how close they are to their progenitor. Intergra, Impreza, Maxima, the Japanese are masters of this tact, taking an emotive word, truncating it and adding an a to the end. I hate those.
335i, 348GTB, 350E; these are based on some parameter of the vehicle – usually engine displacement and lineup position, and that’s okay, but unless there’s years of storied history backing the nomenclature, it lacks uniqueness. The names that really have impact are ones that drive both imagery of the brand and a connected positive attribute- the strength of a galloping herd of horses in the case of the Mustang, a powerful light warcraft for the Corvette. Names like these elicit a connection that’s weighted in reality, and because of that, they seem to have  greater sense of permanence than the made up names that come and go on other cars.
There are also names that are real English words, but because of a weak connection to an external image, they seem to lack that kind of impact. Honda sold the Prelude for a long time, establishing it as a significant member of their lineup. And then it went away. Miss it? Now think about the Thunderbird, a name steeped in both automotive and Native American culture. It’s been a few years since it went away, and I’ll bet a bunch of folks would like to see that name resurrected. Same thing with ‘Cobra.’
So, is it true, are all the great car names gone? Is there any animal name, force of nature, or powerful icon from which a memorable name can be derived? What would you like to see as a car or truck name that has never been used before?
Image sources: [cartype.com]

89 thoughts on “Hooniverse Asks- What's a Good Un-Used Real Thing Car Name?”
  1. "Honda sold the Prelude for a long time, establishing it as a significant member of their lineup. And then it went away. Miss it?"
    Yes. Yes I do miss it.

    1. my prelude owning friends and i (not a prelude owner) always wondered.. "prelude to what?"
      but yeah.. i'd like to see it come back…

      1. I don't remember much about usenet, but I do remember that I used to read a usenet group (rec.autos.makers.ford.mustang perhaps?) where the Prelude was consistently renamed to Quaalude.

  2. I'm still waiting on my Utopian Turtletop or a Thundercougarfalconbird.
    If I'm not mistaken, Blackbird remains unused though, if you're into the aeronautical connection.

    1. mmmmm maybe even a Super thundercougarfalconbird… i'd buy it.
      (i love that show… i don't have a dvr (well… kinda but it's slow to process/encode) I use my dad's dvr.. apparently i accidentally set it to 'record series' when setting it to record the new episodes….. so… now it records all the re-runs too… well.. i had been deleting them (while my dad was out of town– own the whole series on dvd… ) i've gone over there a few times for lunch to find them watched… and not deleted… guess my dad now likes the show too… awesome.)

  3. The BMW Douchebag Special?
    The Lexus Octogenarian?
    How about the Dodge Stubborn? I can see the commercials now. "The 2013 Stubborn: because this company should have been dead decades ago, but goddammit we're staying put."

  4. Has there ever been a car named Hero?
    Amp for an electric car.
    Box for those things like the Nissan Cube, Scion tB, Kia Soul, Honda Element, etc.
    Hellfire would be a great name for a muscle car. You could brand engineer a platform mate the Brimstone.

  5. Blaster.
    – Yamaha used it for an ATV and had a couple of Waveblaster PWCs
    – Harley had the Buell Blast
    – There was the Road Blaster video game…
    …but I don't think it has ever been used for a car.

  6. We could also have a discussion about what name least fits the car. My entry? Buick Wildcat. More like Buick Garfield, especially in later years, Fat, slow, and lazy, like an overfed housecat.

  7. Which makes one wonder, how long until we have to contend with four-ton Toyota Blockades barreling down our streets and highways?

        1. I recall that when Motorcyclist reviewed the Honda FT500 Ascot, they dubbed it a "decongestion bike."
          What a great term.

  8. What about the cars named after races and tracks? Daytona, Talladega, Grand Prix etc… Maybe they could try using "Bristol" or maybe "Pikes Peak" for some Jeep type vehicle.
    Otherwise maybe some musical terms for car names. The new "Jazz" or the "Crishendo" or the "Treble Cleff"…wait, that last one might not work.

  9. The first model will be called Geoff, then the second generation will change the name to Hammerhead Eagle iThrust
    But why not more animal names. The Piranha or the Osprey or the Gazelle.
    Still nothing beats the Legend though. "It's our first car so it must be great"

    1. I heard a rumor the Honda Crosstour was originally going to be called the Platypus?

    2. The original name for the SVT Focus was the Piranha. Some people have made replica name plates and everything

  10. We've named cars after birds, snakes, horses and cats. My inner 6 year old demands cars named after dinosaurs! Be honest, you'd all line up for test drives in a Volkswagen Monoclonius, Dodge Iguanodon or Nissan Ceratosaur.

    1. I could see the Dodge T-Rex truck.
      There's a good chance the Ford Raptor is named more for the Velociraptor than birds.

    1. The Anaconda would need exceptionally wide seats.
      My Anaconda don't want none unless you got BUNS, hon!

  11. Once I was thinking how many car names were also professions… I had limited it to FMC names at the time.
    Explorer, Ranger, Mountaineer, Navigator….. and I figured I could count Escort as a profession too.

  12. How about Kestral? It's a small member of the hawk family. It'd fit great on a Miata-sized sports car.
    Thinking of dog breeds: Doberman, Terrier, Akita, and Rottwiler.
    Cheetah
    The Elephant (plenty of TRUNK space!)
    Sherpa
    Lepard
    Racoon
    All I can think of right now.

    1. Some of these have already been used:
      Riley Kestrel
      Leyland Sherpa (English van)
      Nissan Leopard (Infiniti M30 and J30 in US)

  13. The Chairman.
    Why not just have a whole series of cars named after colors. The Red. The White. The Black. The Fuschia.
    I've got a red White. A what? A red White! What is that, pink or something. No man, my White. It's red. Yeah and I've got a white Black. Naw, it's more mauve.

    1. Already used – Ssangyong/Daewoo Chairman.
      The Alfa 75/Milano was sold in the US in Silver, Gold, Platinum, and Verde (Green) editions.

    2. My father has a 3 foot long stainless still grill from the 60's with "The Chairman" in cast iron lettering. I secretly plot how to steal it from him.

  14. All my names seem to have a case of the Machos or the Munchies.
    Dodge Dominator
    Chevy Altitude
    Honda Vanguard
    Pontiac Burninator (I know Pontiac is dead, that can't stop the Burninator)
    Ford Beyonder
    Chevy Regulator (cop car)
    Renault Piss

      1. I love it too. I used The Beyonder as a handle before Eggwich, and still do for takeout orders.

    1. in the same context that the Nova wasn't a great name for a car in Spanish-speaking countries? Good one!

  15. Stars and constellations names are nice. There's the Toyota Alphard, the Subaru Alcyone, the Chevy Vega. Star names are always cool. Antares, Aldebaran, Procyon, Spica, Denebola, Cygnus …

  16. VW was on the wind thing for a while. Scirocco, Passat, etc. Let's go with the wind theme, only let's pick some serious winds. Like hurricanes. So we would have the Kia Katrina, Hyundai Hugo, Audi Andrew, Cadillac Camille, and so on. Chevy dealers would have an accompanying captive import, the Geo Storm Surge . . .

    1. some wind names I don't think have been used yet.
      Santa Ana
      Typhoon
      Cyclone
      Northeaster
      Tornado
      Chinook
      Squall
      Bora
      Kohilo
      Solar wind
      Maria

        1. Also:
          VW Bora:
          <img src="http://www.ridelust.com/wp-content/uploads/nuevo-vw-bora-2009-01.jpg&quot; width="500">
          Oldsmobile Toronado (yeah yeah, close enough)
          <img src="http://www.globalcar.com/img/17232701.jpg"&gt;
          Boeing Chinook:
          <img src="http://www.eodkingnothingscastle.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/canadian1470051.jpg"&gt;
          (Okay, technically not a car, but from the techs I've talked to, they consider it one, since it spends more time on the ground in the shop than it does actually flying…)

          1. I should have remembered of the Maserati doh! ya the Toronado to close and a better sounding name than Tornado how about Fujita, Class 5, or F5
            anyway the rest were off my radar, thanks

  17. There used to be a Timberline all-terrain tire from the Dayton brand (a value line of Bridgestone/Firestone IIRC.)

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