taycan crossturismo dakar

Hooniverse Asks: What’s a car you wish was real but isn’t?

Jeff Glucker

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Sure, the Porsche Taycan CrossTurismo is real. But I want a Dakar Design Edition. I’m talking an electric Porsche wagon with relatively small wheels (without killing the brake size), nice knobby tires, some underbody protection, and some off-road trails pre-loaded into the nav system. Porsche could make this happen, call it a limited edition, and sell every single one in a flash. Most would never see dirt, but the few that did would be elevated to hero car status.

What’s a car that you wish was real but is currently only parked in a heated garage parking space inside your brain?

About

Jeff Glucker

Jeff Glucker

Jeff Glucker is the co-founder and Executive Editor of Hooniverse.com. He’s often seen getting passed as he hustles a 1991 Mitsubishi Montero up the 405 Freeway. IG: @HooniverseJeff

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12 responses to “Hooniverse Asks: What’s a car you wish was real but isn’t?”

  1. Thornton Avatar
    Thornton

    a car shaped like the old Audi Quattro but electric and about 350 miles of range

    Reply
    1. Sjalantasy Avatar
      Sjalantasy

      Ha! I’m thinking much the same way. A GAZ 24/Volvo 245/Hyundai Dynasty with a decent EV conversion. My real life car-interested friends just roll their eyes. Some gas guys feel threatened by EVs, and I don’t get it. Why not both?

      Reply
  2. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    A Volvo 245 with the drivetrain of a Ford Bronco.

    Sorta like this 122 with a Toyota 22R and Hilux drivetrain, but more brickish, and more 302 4bbl.

    Ebay Find: We’d Take This 1968 Volvo 122 Trar Over Any Subaru

    Reply
  3. marmer Avatar
    marmer

    Alfa Romeo Giulia Sportwagon. Modern Camry wagon. Updated Chevolet Caprice SS on modern RWD platform. Pontiac as a performance brand and Oldsmobile as a design/engineering showcase. Modern Cadillac XLR done well. Four-door Lincoln Continental convertible.

    Reply
  4. OA5599 Avatar
    OA5599

    The Wombat.

    Reply
    1. Jeff Glucker Avatar
      Jeff Glucker

      Insert crying child gif

      Reply
  5. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    GTI wagon – all the parts exist, but I believe even the Euro market only gets a GTD wagon (but I don’t want a diesel), or a Golf R wagon (but I don’t need AWD, or the extra expense, and plaid seats über alles).

    Also, a modern Westfalia at prices closer to the older ones (inflation adjusted, of course). The pop-top Mercedes Metrises fit the same purpose pretty well, but they get really spendy. I’m not even sure the VW California would be much cheaper even if it were sold here.

    Reply
  6. kernel_panik Avatar
    kernel_panik

    A hot hatch from Jaguar. Unless you count the E-type 2+2 coupe, they’ve never attempted one and they actually have all the pieces to do it now. Take the E-pace, lower its suspension, maybe chop down its greenhouse a bit. With all the R&D they have invested in making that platform handle competently they could have a recipe for the mother of all hyper hatchbacks. Put a British interior in something sending ~300 HP to all four wheels and it’d be competitive with a Golf R or AMG A35.

    Reply
    1. outback_ute Avatar
      outback_ute

      XE fastback? Or shortened version of – it would be good to have a longitudinal-engine hatch again now the BMW 1-series is fwd.

      I’d also add a shooting brake version of the new Toyobaru twins or the Mazda MX5, and I’d also have liked to have seen an RTV version of the FG Falcon ute, basically safari-ed from the factory but they can do some stuff the aftermarket can’t easily do.

      Reply
      1. kernel_panik Avatar
        kernel_panik

        I was tempted to wish for a BRZ86 shooting brake. Then I realized the first thing I would do to such a car is install a rear strut tower brace for torsional rigidity, thus negating the car’s purpose.

        There is an XF Sportbrake, but I’m sot sure where it’s still available: https://hooniverse.com/jaguar-xf-sportbrake-exhibit-j-in-the-fight-for-more-wagons/

        Reply
        1. outback_ute Avatar
          outback_ute

          The good thing about a brace like that is you could remove it to carry a big load, and reinstall it for a trackday or canyon run

          Reply
  7. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    A new mid-engined Alfa Spider with a V6 like the Busso engine, but also available in a fastback 2 seat coupe. Styled with the Stradale as the influence. Priced about the same level as the Porsche Boxster/Cayman.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfa_Romeo_33_Stradale#/media/File:1968_Alfa_Romeo_Tipo_33_Stradale.jpg

    Reply