Classic Captions – The 1991 Isuzu Amigo Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post. This is a series of posts that are set to run this time every Tuesday, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous, snarky, or thought provoking caption that is some how tied in with the image. Last week this feature was on hiatus for a very good reason… I received a second degree burn that was of my own making (Pot, Boiling Water, Bare Hand… Fill in the blanks). So, with no further mishaps, let’s go!

1966 Jeepster-02-03

Two weeks ago, we had an image of a Jeepster on the beach, and we had one of the lowest response levels since I restarted this feature. (What’s up with that?) Ever vigilant Needthatcar came up with a very clever caption for this image, and it went like this: “Polygamy was going great for Ezra, but his fourth wife turned out to be a bitch.” Very clever including the dog within the image, but it didn’t bring home the bacon this time.

The winner this time was from OA5599, which came at the expense of another Hooniverse fan: “Antoine planned to take his Charles Barrett Special back to the dealership for some calibration. It was attracting members of the opposite sex…and species! Very well done, so congratulations once again OA5599!

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks image. In keeping with the beach theme from the last three weeks, this is an advertising image for the 1991 Isuzu Amigo, driving through the surf. It is a typical early 90s beach image, with a small SUV going through the highly corrosive salt water, and the beautiful girl making an ass of herself. The ad copy states that it’s not only fun, it’s MAX FUN (whatever that means). I’m sure you can come up with a great caption for this interesting image. (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate entries, and after watching re-runs of… you know, I could reuse the Gidget line again this week, but I wont. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this Summertime Image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

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61 responses to “Classic Captions – The 1991 Isuzu Amigo Edition”

  1. Devin Avatar
    Devin

    Annette celebrates her rescue from the Jeep ad just out of frame.

    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Best clean one in a long, long time.

  2. Van_Sarockin Avatar
    Van_Sarockin

    Not available in Blue.

  3. needthatcar Avatar

    Beach Ball: Fun For a Girl and a Boy.

  4. Scandinavian Flick ★ Avatar
    Scandinavian Flick ★

    Bob was excited to show off his new Amigo's Messiah mode, and Cheryl was quick to become a true believer.
    However, Steve, being the skeptic that he was, just couldn't take it on faith. He drowned shortly after…

  5. $kaycog Avatar
    $kaycog

    Way to go, OA5599! Here's a Jeep on its way to Margaritaville for your winning caption!
    <img src="http://www.top-offroaders.com/wp-content/gallery/offroad-girls/girl-on-jeep-3.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

    1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
      Irishzombieman☆

      OAAAAAA! OA! OA! OAAAAAAAA!
      OAAAAAA!
      OAAAAAA!
      BAM! Kick-ass, OA5599! Here's a Brewdog Challenger to reward your efforts!
      <img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/ratebeer/image/upload/w_120,c_limit,q_80,d_beer_def.gif/beer_168946.jpg&quot; >

    2. ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq

      <img src="http://www.mysocalledsensorylife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/birds-and-bees-600×390.jpg"&gt; You have to understand, it was a different era OA, congrats!

    3. OA5599 Avatar
      OA5599

      Thank you. No dog there.

  6. Maxichamp Avatar

    Raise your hand, if you're Sure.

    1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
      Irishzombieman☆

      My very first thought.
      I still remember every word to the song. Damn the strength of advertising jingles.

      1. Maxichamp Avatar

        Or: I've got a headache this big, and it has Excedrin written all over it.

          1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
            Irishzombieman☆

            This always made me think of the Pixies, doing a Jesus And Mary Chain song.

          2. Number_Six Avatar
            Number_Six

            "…takin' myself to a dirty part of town wherAPPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!!!"

          3. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
            Irishzombieman☆

            HA HA!
            "And the world could die in pain IF THEY DON'T APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!"

        1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
          Irishzombieman☆

          BOOM boom boom boom BOOM boom boom boom
          From the land of sky blue waters,
          Waaaaaters!
          From the land of pines, lofty balsams,
          Comes the beer refreshing,
          Hamm's, the beer refreshing.
          Brewed where nature works her wonders,
          Aged for many moons, gently mellowed,
          Hamm's the beer refreshing,
          Hamm's the beer refreshing.
          Hamm's.
          —————————–
          I was 8 years old when I first started singing this song. Drove my mom nuts.
          When I was ten, there was a case of Hamm's at a family picnic. I snuck on under my shirt, hid behind a bush, thought about refreshing sky blue water, and popped the top.
          I shall never forget the disappointment I felt at that moment.

          1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
            Peter Tanshanomi

            Greaser: Do you know why I like 5th Avenue candy bars?
            Poodle Girls: Is it the creamy milk chocolate?
            Greaser: No, no-o-o-o, no.
            Poodle Girls: Is it the crunchy peanut bu-u-u-tter?
            Greaser: No, no-o-o-o, no.
            Poodle Girl #1 (spoken): Well then, why DO you like 5th Avenue candy bars?
            Greaser: Because — it's the bite that's ri-i-ight!
            Background Greaser (falsetto): 5th A-ha-venu-u-u-u-ue!
            Greaser: Candy Ba-a-a-a-rs!

          2. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
            Irishzombieman☆

            HA! Reminds me:
            "You got your peanut butter in my chocolate!"
            "NO, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter!"

          3. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
            Peter Tanshanomi

            <img src="http://www.littlewingautogyro.com/pictures/threewings2.jpg"&gt;
            I'm at a fly-in, about 20 years ago, admiring an autogyro. The pilot of a plane parked next to it yells over to the pilot on the other side, "Hey, you got your helicopter in my airplane." The other guy doesn't miss a beat and replies, "You got your airplane in my helicopter!"
            I sincerely want to believe that those guys didn't know each other or the gyro pilot, because otherwise it wouldn't be nearly as perfect a moment as if they were utter strangers at that moment.

          4. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
            Peter Tanshanomi

            "I shall never forget the disappointment I felt at that moment."
            At about the same age, after extended pestering of my uncle at a family picnic, he let me have a sip of his Genesee Cream Ale. I was astonished how little it tasted like cream.

          5. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
            Irishzombieman☆

            Not quite the same as cream soda, eh?

          6. ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
            ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq

            Similar thing happened to me and a Coors Light, the silver bullet, made from the cool refreshing mountain water or whatever that ad said.

          7. Alff Avatar

            My grandad was a devotee of cheap beer. At 12 he gave me my first Schmidt, followed rapidly by two more. Thus began the long descent to where I am now, although grampa probably wouldn't appreciate my snobbish tastes. I miss you, gramps.

  7. $kaycog Avatar
    $kaycog

    "Whee! Si, Senor, I always wanted to ride an Amigo in the water!"

  8. Number_Six Avatar
    Number_Six

    At first we weren't really comfortable with Steve's new white supremacist girlfriend, Becky. But when Steve pointed out Becky was so stupid she couldn't even get the salute right, we all laughed and laughed.

    1. fodder650 Avatar
      fodder650

      Hail Sitler!

  9. skitter Avatar
    skitter

    Investigators later determined the vehicle was deliberately driven into deep water, the surfboards were mounted incorrectly for floatation, and the blonde drowned because she couldn't get the tailgate open.

  10. SSurfer321 Avatar
    SSurfer321

    It took only one small kelp pocket for Jim to realize the need for mandatory rear seatbelts.

  11. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    No clever caption, unfortunately, but I am contractually obligated to comment on how much I want a 1st gen Amigo.

    1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
      Irishzombieman☆

      Me too.
      This'n's right down the road. Damn my empty wallet.
      http://fresno.craigslist.org/cto/3732008106.html

      1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
        Peter Tanshanomi

        I saw a nice Amigo on a local Honda dealer's lot back in '09. I immediately whipped into the lot and checked it over—clean interior with no rips or noticeable wear, good paint, no dents or rust, bright aluminum wheels, good tires… I went inside and asked what they wanted for it.
        …They said it was a cash-for-clunkers trade-in. I was gobsmacked. The salesman said he couldn't believe it either.

        1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
          Irishzombieman☆

          Gaaaa! I remember the junkyards after that. All that damned pink paint on ruined engines. Depressing as hell.

          1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
            Peter Tanshanomi

            Found a photo I snapped with my cell phone. The paint wasn't grody, it was just a bit dirty.
            <img src="http://tanshanomi.com/temp/0828091803-web.jpg"&gt;

          2. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
            Irishzombieman☆

            I'd've been tempted to steal it.

        2. ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
          ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq

          I sat here and winced as I read that.

    2. dwbf11 Avatar
      dwbf11

      Don't buy one on an Impulse.

      1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
        Peter Tanshanomi

        Heavens no! It shouldn't be getting up on an Impulse out in public to start with!

      2. Vairship Avatar
        Vairship

        And don't sign the contract with your Stylus, or you'll look like a Rodeo clown.

  12. ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
    ˏ♂ˊ mzs zsm msz esq

    A macho Bible gal.
    edit: It's an anagram of "Beach ball. Amigo," Even gets the capitalization right. I was thrilled when it popped in my head 🙁

    1. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
      Irishzombieman☆

      Awesome. Frickin' awesome.

  13. engineerd Avatar

    The Isuzu Amigo is capable of carrying you and your open-air passengers across the oceans.* You have my word on it.
    *He's lying.

  14. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
    Irishzombieman☆

    Seconds later, a wardrobe malfunction and subsequent FCC inquiry ended Isuzu's pioneering foray into live advertising.

  15. lilwillie Avatar

    I only have one friend, I drive it daily. I had to pay these Amigo's to be seen riding in my friend.

    1. P161911 Avatar

      Say hello to my little friend.

  16. dukeisduke Avatar
    dukeisduke

    "The Isuzu Amigo is 93 percent less prone to roll over and kill us all than the Suzuki Samurai! Hooray!"

    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      "I'm not cooped up in the back of a stinkin' Bronco II! Hooray!"

  17. P161911 Avatar

    Warning: Driving in salt water will void rust protection warranty.

  18. Alff Avatar

    That's only half of the ad. The second shot, entitled "Beach Balling", was rejected by all mainstream publications.

    1. Scandinavian Flick ★ Avatar
      Scandinavian Flick ★

      Penthouse is a mainstream publication.

    2. fodder650 Avatar
      fodder650

      Alff – Noted submitter to the old Penthouse Forums

  19. Irishzombieman☆ Avatar
    Irishzombieman☆

    After months of market research and product launch preparation, someone thought to check the literal translation of the new product name.
    All hell broke loose.
    Armando the disgruntled intern was promptly fired and later sued, the vehicle’s name was hastily changed to “Amigo”,
    and several commercial printers were faced with the disposal of literally tons of marketing material for the non-existent
    Isuzu Gilipollas.

  20. dwbf11 Avatar
    dwbf11

    Dammit Clarissa! You're only supposed to do the fake lasso arm-extension thing on the Rodeo photo shoot!

  21. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    Sylvia begged her friends to put the top down. For the rest of the day, they responded in kind.
    …or…
    On the way to the beach, Sylvia said she was looking forward to putting the top down when they got there. They were sorely disappointed when they realized what she meant.
    …or…
    When Sylvia enthused over the feeling of riding topless, her boyfriend pointed out that she was actually only strapless.
    …oh, I give up. I know there's something clever in there somewhere; I just can't find it.

    1. P161911 Avatar

      The Isuzu wouldn't be the only one to lose its top after the case of beer was done.

  22. wisc47 Avatar
    wisc47

    Sally felt the Impulse to cheer whenever she was around an Isuzu.

  23. Alcology Avatar
    Alcology

    This movie poster has left an "s" off the main title.

  24. Neen85 Avatar
    Neen85

    Amigo = Friend
    (optional 'friend' mannequin package shown)

  25. Vavon Avatar
    Vavon

    His passengers were shouting Mu the whole time, but Amigo had no idea what all that Jazz was about.
    <img src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c231/MentalMu1/jazz.jpg"&gt;

  26. Juliet C. Avatar
    Juliet C.

    Yea you can take a sunbathe in our Amigo. But you'll have to take it the rear.

  27. Tomsk Avatar

    Unseen disclaimer: The Amigo is not actually a beach ball. Do not attempt to pass it out to spectators at a sporting event, or balance it on a seal's nose.