The reboot of the Hooniverse Classic Captions Contest two weeks ago was well received, and after skipping a week (due to the low traffic normally seen on a Monday holiday), we’re back with another vintage automobile publicity photo for you to mock get creative with. This time it’s the most malaise-y of Mustang IIs, the formal-roofed, puffy-vinyled Ghia notchback, at a small airport. Why is it parked on the apron, who are those men, and what is going on? That’s all up to you.
Last week’s image of winter scuba diving with a ’62 Chevy wagon elicited a wide range of comments. Mr.Roadrage‘s suggestively creepy narrative, “You can stop searching for my husband, boys; I’ve already spent the insurance money!” tied for top votes with Alff‘s comment, “Shrinkage will never be a problem with the big new ’62.” Well done, boys. I was pleased to see that the third most highly upvoted comment was not a caption, but dukeisduke‘s statement, “Yay, Captions are back!” I’m glad y’all agreed with the sentiment.
I’m looking forward to equally clever quips for today’s contest. Even though the setting isn’t as unlikely and inexplicable as last week, the car is certainly an easier target for humor.
Classic Captions – 1976 Mustang II Ghia Edition
By Peter Tanshanomi
Jun 6, 2016
By Peter Tanshanomi
Tanshanomi is Japanese [単車のみ] for "motorcycle(s) only." Though primarily tasked with creating two-wheel oriented content for Hooniverse, Pete is a lover of all sorts of motorized vehicles.
Kamil Kaluski 
Robby DeGraff
“I see you just bought one of the new Mustangs. See that guy over there? Name’s Bull. He pushes things. I’ll give you his number.”
“So tell me again how this is different from a Pinto.”
Thirty second of negotiations ended when Bob walked away with $16 and a carne asada burrito and Jimmy got a beige Ford. Each thought they’d gotten the better end of the deal.
“You’re only rated for visual flight rules but you don’t want to be seen in it. I sympathize but that doesn’t mean you can just leave it parked here.”
“A Mustang II?!? Couldn’t you rent an LTD, or at least a Torino? The plane’s gonna be here in a few minutes. How much coke do you think we’re gonna be able to stuff into that trunk?”
hey look, it’s my favorite flying My Little Pony, Derpy.
“There hasn’t been a Mustang on this airstrip since 1949”
“There still isn’t.”
I’ll take “Things great grandma might say for $200, Alex”
Walter was dismayed to learn that he could not trade a Mustang II straight-up for a Bellanca Citabria; the salesman at the Ford dealer had assured him it was a future classic, after all.
To be fair, in the equine world, Pinto and Mustang aren’t mutually exclusive, either.
“The Mustang II is the perfect pilot’s car. I often have to leave my car parked unattended for extended periods of time. If I drove a car I gave half a crap about, I’d worry.”
A fox is closer to a falcon than a horse of a different color, and your lucky numbers are 6, 90, and 1,237.
The lifestyle of fast cars, fast planes, and black market arms deals, was … somewhere very far away.
After his first solo flight, Roger had a solo drive home, followed by a solo dinner, a solo evening in, and a solo weekend. “Am I that unattractive?” he thought, while polishing his new pride and joy.
“If that don’t beat all. I never saw such a dog.” Old Yella
That’ll do Mustang… that’ll do..
“You’re the guy who designed this thing? Okay, I’ll fly out out of the country, but you gotta pay cash.”
He didn’t really care,
What she did with her hair.
He thought she was vain,
When she bought that plane.
He was ready to run away,
When she asked him to the runway.
He was ready to say goodbye,
Before they went up high.
But it was her that said “See ya!”
Because he drove up in that Ghia.
“Alright, as soon as I’m done this test flight we can start work on the AVE Mizar Sport.”
Was just now trying to figure out how to make that connection.
Well, it *is* Pinto based.
“If the wings fit, I’d better quit!”, said the test pilot…
Mustang II, after flying, it’s quite a come down!
“Any parking you can walk away from… is a good parking.”
“Any Mustang II you walk away from…”