This Just In: Teens' Still Not Criminal Masterminds

Robert Emslie

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A tip to car jackers and other teen criminals on the run from the Po-Po; run FORWARD. Check out the mayhem after the jump.


These three Maryland teens, suspected of carjacking and armed robbery, are trying to elude the police in a stolen SUV. Many adolescent scofflaws have poor academic records, and this driver obviously wasn’t pay attention in driver’s ed class when they explained what that ‘R’ on the gear lever means.

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Robert Emslie

Robert Emslie

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  1. xomputer Avatar
    xomputer

    R is obviously for RUN AWAY??

    Reply
  2. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    I'm guessing it was a slow news day for channel 5 if they managed to stretch that out to two minutes (He was in a squad car just like that one? You don't say? I would've thought he was in a '95 Cadillac Fleetwood. And the officer's got a daughter? I don't believe it, I demand proof!).
    On the other hand, it's impressive to see the Escape's either got that much ground clearance, or that much guts.

    Reply
    1. Robert Emslie Avatar
      Robert Emslie

      I think the interceptor was a Chevy Impala, which I'm guessing has a pointier nose than the Crown Vic. It'd be interesting to see what would have happened had it been some Ford on Ford action.

      Reply
      1. SSurfer321 Avatar
        SSurfer321

        It would have birthed a Fiesta!

        Reply
        1. LTDScott Avatar
          LTDScott

          That comment was falcon awful.

          Reply
      2. Age_of_Aerostar Avatar
        Age_of_Aerostar

        if you look closely, you can see windshield washer fluid nozzles on the hood.
        This rules out both the Impala and the Crown Vic.
        My guess is that it's a Dodge Charger.

        Reply
  3. Froggmann_ Avatar
    Froggmann_

    "Wait watch this! I saw it at a monster truck rally once…"

    Reply