The News for May 26th, 2023

Welcome to the Hooniverse News! As always, this is a weekly recap of the biggest stories in the automotive industry without the fluff or bull. This week: Aston Martin’s new Super Tourer is here, BMW hits the 5 Series with the Ugly Stick, Ford EVs will soon have access to Tesla Superchargers, and Lexus shows us more of the all-new GX.

Aston Martin DB12

Aston Martin unveiled the replacement for the DB11 this week, but it might not look terribly different at first glance. That’s because the DB12 (no DB13 I guess) is more of an evolution or a fine tuning of the previous design. Certain aspects of the car look identical to the last model, but there’s enough different here that it’s worthy of a new model name. The high-performance GT gets a new face, a new engine, and new tech, plus an interior design that’s far less busy and more elegant.

As you could have guessed, it’s called the DB12 because it has a V8 engine under that long bonnet. As with other engines in the Aston lineup, it’s borrowed from Mercedes-AMG and is a 4.0-liter twin-turbo V8. This one is kicking out a ridiculous 671 horsepower and 590 lb.-ft. of torque. That’s more power than even the optional 5.2-liter V12 in the DB11 made. They say the DB12 can reach 60 mph from a standstill in 3.5 seconds and top out at 202 mph.

Design-wise, Aston channeled the DBS Superleggera with a bigger front grille and a redesigned front splitter to go with it. It’s different enough that it looks like its own thing, but the similarities are uncanny. What’s definitely DB12-specific is the new headlight design. And what’s practically a direct carryover from the DB11 and DBS is everything from the floating C-Pillar (which they definitely didn’t borrow from Nissan) on back.

The interior represents probably the biggest update on the car. It’s much more sleek and “open” with a slanted touch screen and plenty of physical buttons to operate everything. Notably, the push-button gear selection is gone in favor of this wild new invention called a gear lever. Overall, this is quite the improvement over the last generation of Aston interior designs that tried too hard to be like sports cars when the end result was just a bit awkward at times.

No word on a launch date or pricing info yet.

[Source: Aston Martin]

BMW Uglifies the 5 Series

BMW designers found themselves in a panic after having run out of cars in their lineup to ruin. Fortunately, the day was saved when someone remembered nobody’s done anything with the 5 Series in a few years. The end result is this, a fatter sedan with none of the elegance and simplicity of older models. But at least it doesn’t have shitty grilles like the other half of the lineup.

A range of new gas and diesel (Europe only) four and six-cylinder engines with a 48-volt mild hybrid system plus a fully-electric i5 model will be available at launch. Two plug-in hybrid models will join them next year. There’s been plenty of attention given to the chassis to improve ride quality and stuff. I guess it’ll still be enjoyable to drive too. The i5 is pretty quick because the top model has up to 601 horsepower and 605 lb.-ft. of torque. That’s pretty good I guess. And the 5 Series has a vegan interior as standard which honestly should be something other brands adopt as well.

But that styling though. It’s clear they took the same approach as with the new 7 Series in that they began by making the car as thick as possible to the point that it’s creeping closer to crossover territory. And the rest of it just looks like someone took the 2 Series Gran Touring, one of the most clumsy-looking cars I’ve ever seen, and stretched it over the 5 Series chassis. It’s like one of those weird ass amateur renderings of the next-gen 5 Series some kid on Instagram would use to earn clout actually became a reality.

And while the kidney grille is actually somewhat grounded in reality, higher-end models with advanced driver assistance features literally just have the sensor array strapped on to the front of the grille and blocking part of the design. It’s just so weird and awkward and stupid. BMW really doesn’t know what they’re doing anymore. When they inevitably ruin the 3 Series, they’ll well and truly be dead to me and I will no longer acknowledge their existence.

[Source: BMW]

Tesla opens up Superchargers to Ford owners

In EV news that truly shocked the industry (sorry), Ford and Tesla have managed to work out a deal in between one of Elon’s “how to make Twitter worse” brainstorming sessions. Starting early 2024, Tesla will open up its Supercharger network to Ford owners. And I’m not talking about a squatted F-250 with smoke stacks double parking at a station. I mean Ford EVs charging at Tesla Superchargers.

CEOs Jim Farley and Elon Musk announced it in a Twitter Space last night just as Ford confirmed the news via press release. Even then it was hard to believe. This is a massive deal. The one advantage that nobody could deny Tesla was their bulletproof Cybertruck windows Superchargers. Strategically placed around the country to allow for easier long-distance travel and with rapid charging times, it’s their crown jewel. Ford is the first 3rd party to be allowed access.

Now that’s not without some changes that may or may not be welcomed with some owners. Ford is changing their charging ports from the Combined Charging Standard to the North American Charging Standard. This war over charging ports is one that I was better off not knowing about, but in a nutshell, Tesla uses NACS and most others use CCS. Ford will offer an adaptor that along with a software update will allow them to charge on a Supercharger with an existing Ford EV. Starting in 2025, all new Ford EVs will be built with the NACS ports built in. Some Ford people have discussed the possibility of featuring both ports simultaneously, but that’s a long ways away and is subject to change.

[Source: Ford]

Lexus GX teased again and we like what we see

Lexus says the all-new GX will be revealed on June 8th and based on this teaser image, we like what we see so far. The body-on-frame SUV will clearly adopt a boxier and more rugged look with wide fenders to house some potentially serious off-road wheel/tire setup. The GX has been a long time favorite among the overlanding crowd (just ask Ross), and they certainly seem to be leveraging that reputation with this new model. I’m excited even if I’m nowhere near Lexus’s’sss target market.

[Source: Lexus]

What’s your news for the week?

hooniverse news whats your naws

So that’s all I’ve got for you this week, so now it’s your turn. If you saw anything, fixed something, broke everything, or otherwise did anything even remotely car related that you want to share with your fellow hoon, sound off in the comments.

Have a good weekend.

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14 responses to “The News for May 26th, 2023”

  1. Scoutdude Avatar
    Scoutdude

    I hope Ford does offer both ports but I seriously doubt that will happen due to the added expense and complexity. The Tesla system is already more complex and expensive due to the shared circuit and a motorized lock for the plug. On the one hand I do get it that right now the CCS infrastructure is still lacking but I think there will be a point in the not too distant future where CCS options will be more plentiful than Superchargers and just as reliable.

    I did some more work on cars this week. Wrapped up the stuff on the F-150 and changed the coolant and thermostat in my Black Marauder, and then changed the thermostat back to the one that had been in there when the replacement turned out to be N.E.W. or Never Ever Worked. The thing that really annoys me is that I paid extra for the “Stant” stainless steel unit that arrived in a Moto Rad package. The one that came out didn’t look original so for now it is what it is and hopefully I can get my money back for the defective one w/o too much hassle. That’s what I get for trying to be proactive.

    Other parts arrived with the T-stat so up next on the list is to change the diff fluid on the Black Marauder and see how much if any metal the magnet has caught. The second time I changed it after the wheel bearing replacement there wasn’t a lot and I’m hoping that there is even less or hopefully none this time. I also have the blend door motor for the Blue Marauder and the steering box for the F-250 though I think I’m going to order a steering arm for it so I don’t have to fight with the old one. So hopefully I’ll at least get either the blend door or gear oil done this weekend between doing home projects.

    Also went and looked at a car last night, only to be disappointed in its condition for the price. I’m debating on making a short road trip to look at another couple of prospects.

    1. wunno sev Avatar
      wunno sev

      i used to think it was a little silly to boil thermostats to check them, but i’ve heard too many stories like this. i do it every time now!

      1. Scoutdude Avatar
        Scoutdude

        Here is the funny thing about boiling thermostats, according to Ford it can damage them. Seriously I was looking through the factory literature to find the proper burping procedure (the radiator is lower than the top water outlet) and read that in the general information section. I’ve done it in the past and never noticed any damage from doing it. It isn’t like you could get the water hotter than it may experience inside a pressurized coolant mix.

    2. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      Batshitbox likes this, but can’t get the star button to work.

  2. Salguod Avatar

    Got my bathroom remodel as done as I can get while I wait for a back ordered plumbing part to install the tub. That means some long overdue car projects will get some attention.

    My youngest’s Protege has had a long time occasional no crank condition. A while ago I replaced the cheap and poorly installed replacement battery cable terminals which helped, for a while. Then it came back and I cleaned the engine ground and replaced the battery, which helped some, but didn’t cure it. This week I replaced the starter, which I hope fixes it for good.

    I also found time to pull the ignition switch from the Boxster to see which type I had and order a replacement. It was a $20 gamble to fix the no crank condition it’s had since the fall. No dice. Next I look at the starter and maybe the clutch safety switch on it. If not, that points to the immobilizer, not a cheap fix.

    Then I’ve got the new struts for the front of the Boxster and new shocks and springs for the front of the Tundra. And I think the Thunderbird needs a battery, haven’t tried to start it yet this year.

    1. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      Batshitbox likes this, but can’t get the star button to work.

  3. wunno sev Avatar
    wunno sev

    went out and bought the honda engine i found last week. i cannot find a single engine hoist at any harbor freight in the los angeles area, they’re all out of stock.

    i can see that this project is vulnerable to scope creep. i can also imagine it taking an eternity. so my approach will be thus: spend money if it saves time, don’t spend (any more) money on frills. i don’t want to spend a month on wiring just to save $150 on a harness. but anything that takes me from 90 to 160 hp is going to be a hoot by default. i will still have fun with a cheap junkyard gearbox and open diff. keep the spend down but keep the schedule downer.

    right now expecting about $3500 for the whole swap, including engine, trans, mounts, ecu, axles, harness, cat. once it’s running, i can decide if i want to spend more on braking, handling, and comfort. but there’s a solid chance i can’t make it work at all! so i have to get over that hurdle before committing more to this project.

    1. Scoutdude Avatar
      Scoutdude

      That is surprising that they are sold out at all the stores, though I guess in this day and age I shouldn’t be so surprised, good chance they could be out of them chain wide. If you were closer I’d let you borrow mine. Have you checked craigslist, facebook market place ect, to see if you can get a good deal on a lightly used one?

    2. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      Batshitbox likes this, but can’t get the star button to work.

  4. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar

    Working on wiring up The Bride. We’re getting close now.

    1. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      Batshitbox likes this, but can’t get the star button to work.

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  7. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    Sold the Econoline for $2K. Another Gen-X knucklebuster drove up from Santa Cruz with two of his buddies, kicked the tires, peeked under the hood, started it up and drove away without a taking it for a test drive. I assume they made it back to Santa Cruz and were suitably impressed by that test drive. Good old van. I forgot to give them the milk crates with all the manuals, filters, quart bottles and other drek that went with it, and I have to move so I’m stuck with that phlugg. (Yes, I used ‘drek’ and ‘phlugg’ in the same sentence; sue me.)

    Wanderlodge tire guy still hasn’t got all 8 tires in. I think he’s playing me, hoping I’ll opt for a more expensive tire that he has 8 of. Might work, if it goes another month that’s another $250 to keep it parked.

    The DCT transmission on the Africa Twin is having a freak-out but I think it’s software. I bobbled the start button a couple times one morning and I think I gave the computer a spaz attack. I did a bit of a re-set by playing Arkanoid on the handlebar switches (that’s not the gospel version from the service manual but you get the picture) and that calmed things down, but it’s still dragging the clutches at a dead stop. I’ll let the Honda dealer clear the codes, sort that out.

    I’m so glad computers came along to make all of our lives easier. Paying $200 so a guy can plug a computer in and solve all your problems is totally worth it when I recall the pain of looking for vacuum leaks, exhaust leaks, dicking with float bowls, turnbuckling push-pull throttle cables and just not knowing what the hell you even should be doing to solve your problem. Cheers to the guy.