Last Call- Old Racers and Bold Racers Edition


While racing is a sport- it should always be remembered that it’s one for which its participants give of themselves like few others.
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  1. Smells_Homeless Avatar

    While it is indeed true that tragedy is never very far away from the fearless men and women who entertain us with their quest for speed, their is one sport that simply can't be topped in its bloodthirstiness: broomball.
    The horror.

    1. Clashtastic Avatar

      Ehh, my IM Broomball team was fairly bloodless, I think we had one broken finger and that was it.

    2. P161911 Avatar

      Used to play that several years ago with a church singles group. I think 3 out of 5 times we had an ambulance show up. One concussion, a broken bone, and some missing teeth.

  2. Tomsk Avatar

    Hemingway said it best: "The only sports are bullfighting, mountaineering and motor racing. The rest are merely games."
    Also: Since the wussification of Hockenheim in 2002, the track no longer passes by the crash site and that marker; you have to walk out into the wilderness to reach it.

    1. acarr260 Avatar

      Wow, I didn't know that. I was in Hockenheim on business last month and we skipped going to the track because nobody was racing when we were there. Also, I'm stealing that Hemingway quote.

    2. engineerd Avatar

      I just put that in my favorite quotations. Awesome.

  3. CptSevere Avatar

    I've desperately wanted to race something, anything, since I was a kid. I participated in bicycle races, skateboard slaloms, and the like as a kid, but never anything outside of the occasional stupid street thing. I've hooned everything from a parachute to various bikes to big American boats and on and on, but have always wanted to mix it up on a track. Turning, not spinning around in circles. I come from a sports car Back East family, and have always wanted to road race. Back when I had old bikes, I wanted to get into vintage bike racing, but now, I swear, I'm gonna get a LeMons thing going. It's Sick and Wrong, and I like that.

    1. P161911 Avatar

      At least get down to your local SCCA Solo II autocross. Not wheel to wheel, but still legal/legitimate hooning, plus it is truly "run what you brung".

      1. Thrashy Avatar

        Seconded. It ain't as glamorous as racing on a road course, but it's every bit as competitive. Plus, you can run some really crazy things that you couldn't easily find a class for in road racing.

    2. Jeff Glucker Avatar
      Jeff Glucker

      I have to tell you… after 2 LeMons races under my belt, it is FUCKING addicting.
      I spent a bit of the LA Auto Show hanging out with a gentleman who works for a very wealthy gentleman. He manages this rich guy's fleet of cars, and supports his private race team… he wrenches on the cars for him AND splits driving duties. The fleet includes a 275 Ferrari and a D-Type Jag – amongst some high-end prepped-Porsches.
      I think he had to slap me in the face to get me to stop following him…
      When I become rich from Hooniverse in the year 2165 (oh, you havent heard? I plan to live forever), I will form a race team of my own that does LeMons and the other stuff out there.
      Also at LeMons I spotted Patrick Dempsey walking around… I had to fight the urge to show him photos of the Uberbird.
      Sidenote: I have heard that it is easy to form a team for the 25 Hours of Thunderhill… I am going to look into this more. Anyone have a car we could prep for something like this? Scott… I think we could turn the Porcubimmer into a real racing machine.

  4. LTDScott Avatar

    That quote is on my NASA racing shirt.

    1. Jeff Glucker Avatar
      Jeff Glucker

      You race space ships!?

  5. scroggzilla Avatar

    A small photgraphic collection of Mr. Clark on the job.

  6. engineerd Avatar

    Skitter once said on Jalopnik, "There's nothing quite like striving towards a goal that could kill you." I'm sure he was talking about some contraption someone built that was more likely to kill its creator than bring him glory, the same sentiment applies to racing. We are driven to find our limits, as well as the limits of our craftsmanship. An unfortunate, but necessary, aspect of this is that at times we cross those limits. I think that our society, at times, can be overly risk averse. Every time someone dies doing something, there is a significant segment of the population that wants to ban that activity — whether it be kids playing sports or space exploration. We start at a young age: hanging upside down on the monkey bars, jumping off the roof of the house, racing bikes down hills with a fairly busy street at the bottom, etc. I hope that we are not removing this spirit of exploration and finding the limits of the human body and human ingenuity from our children.

    1. P161911 Avatar

      I have a whole theory that we now have too many safety devices (bike helmets, air bags, etc) that now allow way too many idiots to live long enough to breed, we are now ending up with second and third generation idiots. In previous generations the majority of the truly stupid would get weeded out of the gene pool way before breeding age.

      1. Tomsk Avatar


    2. CptSevere Avatar

      Nicely written, sir, and I agree.

    3. Thrashy Avatar

      I recall reading that Burt Rutan (Scale Composites head honcho) is of the same opinion. I mean, we go and stick a bumch of people in tin can sittinng on to pof a giant tube of explosives and shoot them out of the atmosphere, and then we get all bent out of shape when some of them die. It's a tragedy when people die, but they *knew* the risks and accepted them. When astronauts/race car drivers/mountain climbers/etc. ought to honor their spirit and move forward as they would have wanted us to do. That's not to say we can't learn lessons and make things safer, but by no means should we call the whole endeavor off.

  7. CptSevere Avatar

    Nicely written, engineerd, and I couldn't agree more.

  8. CptSevere Avatar

    At the moment my vehicles are a '66 F100 and the pictured '64 Chevy motorhome. I'd have to get something a lot less trucky to get into autocross. I can picture myself getting all excited and rolling the motorhome. Besides, the dishes, silverware and all the other crap I keep in there would end up scattered all over the kitchen, not to mention the beer and stuff in the fridge.

    1. P161911 Avatar

      You COULD run the F100. Not sure how fun that would be though…

      1. CptSevere Avatar

        I don't know about fun, but it would be funny watching me spin the steering wheel like a maniac while trying to row through three on the tree. I can just hear all the tools and the like crashing around in the toolbox.

        1. BrianTheHoon Avatar

          Just use a brodie knob and you'll be fine.

  9. CptSevere Avatar

    Yeah, I can just imagine the Envy Radiation you must have been emitting. I would have been doing the same thing. Talk about a nice gig.
    Hell, I'm envious of YOU getting to go to that Auto Show. That's pretty cool right there.

    1. Tomsk Avatar


    2. CptSevere Avatar

      You've gotta be kidding me. That's something else. Actually, I've drag raced the Road Condo from a stoplight against a buddy's Pace Arrow. Mine has a built 350 with an Edelbrock carb and Performer intake manifold, ram's horn exhaust manifolds and dual exhaust. His had a 440 with the same carb and manifold. He beat me.
      Alright, now I'll be pricing sway bars, shocks, etc. so I can autocross the Condo. You guys are getting me in trouble.

      1. Thrashy Avatar

        If it helps any with your self-control, it was posted with a caption to the effect of "This absolutely never ever happened because we're not supposed to do it."

        1. CptSevere Avatar

          Aw, whatta bunch of wusses.

  10. Tanshanomi Avatar

    That's utterly righteous.

  11. Tanshanomi Avatar

    <img src=""&gt;
    Chancing It: Why We Take Risks is the most thought-provoking and helpful discussion of the subject I've found, and it made me a life-long Ralph Keyes fan.