By Kamil Kaluski
From the Massachusetts State Police:
Ramp from Rte 128 northbound to Rte 95 northbound closed for extended period due to liquid asphalt truck rollover. No other vehicles involved. Non life-threatening injuries to the operator.
This, folks is an easy and fast way of immediately upgrading all our roads. Spill so liquid asphalt, enough to cover and fill (in middle school science we learned that liquid takes shape of its container) all road imperfections, and viola, all all roads are buttery smooth after drying in the summer heat for a few hours. You’re welcome, government.
Last Call indicates the end of Hooniverse’s broadcast day. It’s meant to be an open forum for anyone and anything. Thread jacking is not only accepted, it’s encouraged.
Jeff Glucker
Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor’s Bog Roll Holder
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9ec332ee5f69163c10b427a0a5bf48a0d5002b2f65d79777d1502ef77314708b.jpg
Sigh, another commandment broken.
As a geologist and as the son of a highway maintenance supervisor, I’ll point out that it’s “voila,” not “viola.”
I have no other objections to this plan for use in locations far from me.
My dad didn’t work for the highway, though he did jam with teenage Bob Dylan, before Highway 61 was revisited.
It’s a violin. Violas are a bit bigger.
https://kenbutler.squarespace.com/hybrid-instruments
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It’s correct, I wrote it with a Polish accent.
Was Bugs Bunny Polish? I swear he always said, “Viola!” but search algorithms only turn up a new character, Viola Bunny (Bugs’ sister?!?) who probably got her name as a reference to Bugs’ favorite exclamation. Someone in the slapstick-Saturday morning cartoon universe (Stooges? Rascals?) always said, “Viola!”. I remember being late in my teens before seeing the word voila in print and finally making the connection between what my mom said and what the TV said.
I declare it a valid cultural reference regardless of your accent.
I probably learned it from him. Also, The Hogan Family! When Ms. Poole had a cooking TV show but some reason went blind the day of shoot and Dave made whatever she was cooking… at the end she’d always yell “Viola!” and Dave did too.
At least he didn’t write “walla”. I’m fairly certain that there is a significant overlap among people who write “walla” and people who write “should of”.
“Non life-threatening injuries to the operator.”
He was tarred and feathered…
I would have called this spilled pitch– I’ve never heard of liquid asphalt. I guess what I call “asphalt” is really “asphalt concrete” (with the aggregate materials included). Regardless, I’d hate to walk across that barefoot on a hot day.
Liquid asphalt Is a newer variation of a type of pitch.
You could say….
That……
It’s……
A Son Of A Pitch
I have to leave now….
Or drive; lot of cleaning afterwards. Then again if you wanted to undercoat your car…
The driver has got a lot of ‘splaining to do!
Did anyone else see the lead pic really small at first and think it was a driver’s eye view looking out over a glossy black hood of something that had a really wonky intake sticking out of it?
Yep.