Hooniverse Asks- What's the Best Car To Go Watch the 'Submarine Races'?

The one-sheet for the 1960 Mystery Science Theatre staple The Girl in Lovers Lane shows a Plymouth Fury in the background of a girl too young to know. . . too reckless to care. . . you will never forget. Regardless, many people did forget that cheesy drama, but it brings up a point- what is the best car for car-noodling and the attendant heavy breathing that goes along with it? A Fury convertible has its attractions- its seats are wide enough to accommodate an orgy, and its column-mounted shifter means no backdoor surprises when shifting positions. However, while a convertible is full of romantic possibilities, its thin material provides neither insulation nor soundproofing so inhibitions may be kept in check in that one. A good four door, perhaps, owing to the generally more commodious back seat and roll-down rear windows that may be cracked to allow the steam and funk to dissipate post-action. Or may be a Van, with its acres of flat floor and high ceiling. Hell, you could fit a stripper pole in a Sprinter Van, should you be into such things. Motorcycles of course are right out, as are Toyota MR2 spiders because I basically have to get out just to change my mind those things are so small. But other two-seaters have possibilities, and with a Corvette you’re pretty much required by law to do the dirty in it at least once. So, let us know, based on your experience, or stuff you’ve seen in movies, what in your mind is the best car for both hanky and panky? Image sources: [5yaks.com, examiner.com]

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