He Who Dies With The Most Toys Wins. . . Be That Guy

Up for auction on eBay – for a cool $1.2 million – is the collection you see above. Described as 48-years worth of car and part hoarding, it contains hundreds of mid-’50s to late ’70s cars and literally millions of parts all sitting on 4 acres of what is now most likely a more oil-soaked environment than the Gulf of Mexico.
Sitting in bucolic Calais, Vermont – about dead center between routes 91 and 89 – this collection looks like somebody’s personal junkyard, which really is exactly what it is. This collection should really appeal to the Costco bargain hunter who feels that bulk buying is the best way to save money.
Going through the list reveals a lot of chaff amongst the wheat, but some interesting inventory pops out – like a ‘74 454 Corvette with a 4-speed, or a ‘64 Nova conv. w/400sbc. Of course to get those you’re also going to have to take the ’79 Mercury Marquis.
The parts collection is even more eye-popping, at least for the quantity. It does look like the lair of some sort of horror movie deviant, and I don’t know how comfortable I’d be in the room with all the shifters hanging down like so many gentlemen’s joysticks.
It looks like speedos and tachs get special treatment in the curio cabinet, while the massive number of intakes both hang around and take up multiple shelves.
Check out the video here of Uncle Fester’s guided tour of the creepy basement parts storage:
If you’re interested in additional videos, or perhaps making a bid on this once in a lifetime opportunity to buy a small nation’s worth of cars and parts, you can hit up the eBay ad here.

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23 responses to “He Who Dies With The Most Toys Wins. . . Be That Guy”

  1. Schm-san Avatar

    I'd rather spend my 1.2 mil on those brand new M3 evos we saw earlier. You can keep your grand marquis thank you very much. . .

  2. CptSevere Avatar

    PCH doesn't even begin to describe this.

    1. BrianTheHoon Avatar

      You're right. I'd say it's more like PCE (Project Car Eternity)

  3. muthalovin Avatar

    "It does look like the lair of some sort of horror movie deviant, and I don’t know how comfortable I’d be in the room with all the shifters hanging down like so many gentlemen’s joysticks." Indeed. That made me a little sick to the stomach.

  4. lilwillie Avatar

    I'll take it!
    /Checks Power Ball and figures out it ain't happening.

  5. engineerd Avatar

    If you buy this, can you value all but a few cars at more than $500? There's gotta be some LeMons contenders in there.

  6. P161911 Avatar

    Could be a good business opportunity. I'd want to inspect in person first. If the parts count is right you are paying $1 per part and the cars are free! Unless they were counting all the parts still attached to the cars. I would also really like a detailed description on each and every part. I would be clueless on at least 755 of them. Actually if you had the cash the thing to do would be buy this, cherry pick out the good cars and high dollar parts for ebay or your personal collection, then advertise in every auto publication you can think of to have a huge auction, bundle the rest in large lots and sell at no reserve, make sure you put a few good things in each lot. Whatever doesn't go at the auction goes to the scrap yard if you can't figure out what it is or it is worthless.
    Anybody want to loan me $1.5 million (have to cover expenses for a while too), and convince my company to give me a 12 month sabbatical? We can do it as interest as a percentage of the profits.

  7. tonyola Avatar

    I'll take the contract to do the enviro assessment and cleanup on this site after the junk is gone. How much oil, tranny fluid, and battery acid has found its way into the soil?

    1. lilwillie Avatar

      How loose the area laws are and how long it has been there it may be grandfathered in. No clue on Vermont but I know of many locations like this in my area that now have housing developments on them and nothing was done for cleanup. My dads old shop included. Every time he lifted the in-ground hoist he added oil to the reservoir so it would go up. The owner of the building refused to service it so dad said "fuck it" and made due. The location now has a four unit apartment on it and nothing was ever done for cleanup. I know the soil was messed.

      1. tonyola Avatar

        The buyer of your dad's shop (or whoever loaned the money for a sale) may have taken a foolish risk. Federal law states that the buyer (or title holder) of a property can be held liable for environmental damage and cleanup unless the proper due diligence (including a Phase I Environmental Site Assessment as per ASTM-1527) has been performed. There is no grandfathering or local relaxation of this law. I've done over 400 Phase I ESAs on behalf of buyers and lenders. Actually, hydraulic fluid as found in lifts is not all that noxious compared to battery acid and used motor oil.

        1. lilwillie Avatar

          I'm sure the old owner (dad rented this location) and the buyer just gave each other a wink and a nod. It turned into rental property. Much like most the older properties we know of that at one time had some nasty stuff on them. There is another location outside of town that was basically a toxic dump. It has a Million dollar house on it now. Wonder if the builder/owner knows what used to be there…I never saw a ounce of cleanup on the site.
          Thanks for the heads up on the law, I had never read that before or knew there was Federal law written like that.

      2. dustin_driver Avatar

        I used to work for a small-town paper. The town had an Army munitions base for about 100 years. When the Army pulled out, they just dumped everything in a field—mortors, bullets, shells, grenades. People used to get blown up all the time.
        A real estate company bought the dump land. Spent millions and five years or so towing a sled with a metal detector and ground-scanning radar over the property, looking for old bombs. They didn't get finished with the cleanup before the bubble burst. Oops.
        In another part of the same town, a different company built a housing development over a dump. It was an old dump, full of motor oil, antifreeze, bug spray, paint, everything. Five years later, stuff started oozing up in people's back yards. I knew a lady who discovered a pool of foul-smelling black goo in her back yard. The next day her dog died. She moved out.
        Worst part is, there are a lot of communities just like that one all over the world.

    2. J.P. Avatar

      It is probably one of the cleanest junkyards in the country grass doesn't grow in most junkyards check out some pictures @ http://bruceclichecars.synthasite.com/

  8. BrianTheHoon Avatar

    That curio cabinet full of gages HAS to be the most hoontastic image of a piece of furniture I've ever seen. My wife, and every other woman I know, would be horrified and I can't help but giggle about it.

  9. dukeisduke Avatar

    Apparently the guy's name is Bruce Cliche', and it's in East Calais. There's an article on Bangshift, from two years ago, here:
    According to the article, the place cost him his marriage (his house is full of parts), and his relationship with his kids. Wow.

  10. DeadinSideInc Avatar

    If I could retire as a millionaire right now I'd totally do it. It would be kick ass awesome to categorize everything, put it online, sell most of it, and play in my own junk yard.

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