Can you believe the last time we did a Classic Captions Contest here on Hooniverse was back in January of 2017? If you missed that run, travel back in time to this adventurous family, wearing matching khaki “outdoorsy” outfits posing in front of a rad 1987 Toyota Van. Clearly the father, Scott, is armed and ready to photograph the living daylights out of anything “nature” he sees with his green vest. For this revamp of our hilarious Classic Captions Contest, let’s step back even further to this brochure for Cadillac’s 1956 lineup.
It’s a shame that Cadillac today isn’t the Cadillac they used to be. They made cars that were dazzling and high-class. A sophisticated Detroit image you’d park in your driveway (backed in, of course), to show off to friends, family and the neighborhood that you’ve made it; you’ve accomplished something. Dig up any old sales brochure for Cadillac and you’ll see people dressed to the nines wearing white gloves, hats that belong on top of Frank Sinatra’s head, and pressed suits that almost matched their car’s leather-bathed interior.
Sure, today’s Cadillac still builds a fleet of quality, luxurious and even track-ready vehicles, but they all lack that proud, ambassador-esque flair that, say in this case, a 1956 Series 62 Coupe De Ville (pictured) had. You can’t help but see the image above, and then look at shots of the new XT4 crossover and feel depressed. The posh just isn’t there.
Analyze the advertisement above and write your own story for it. We see a swaggered-up couple walking towards a red Coupe De Ville, while behind them, a mysterious man in a black suit nervously holds what appears to be a styrofoam take-out box clutched tightly under his right arm. Our second mysterious thick-rimmed glasses man, on the right seems to be in-stroll and grasping a brown leather dossier with ____ inside.
You finish the rest. Let the comments section below be your script.
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