You can count on Classic Captions to bring the retro. Today we risk overdosing on it, with a gale-force assault of ’70s cliches: multicolored tape stripes, porthole windows, white spoke wheels shod with Goodyear Polyglas tires, and that’s just the vehicle! To that, add such tastefully period touches such as the Honda XL dirtbike, a white cowl-neck knit top, wicker platform wedges, plus a director’s chair and a folding web lawn chair. Stare long enough and you can almost hear strains of England Dan and John Ford Coley emanating from an unseen cassette player. The only question is whether it’s a Sanyo or a Panasonic. If you can’t come up with a clever witticism in response to this, your creative juices have turned to powder inside you, like the blood of those victims in The Andromeda Strain. Or perhaps you’re just young enough to have no idea who England Dan and John Ford Coley are. Um…were.

Monkey10is gave us far-and-away the most popular response to the awkwardly over-saturated photo of last week’s ZAZ 968 Zaporozhets, with this pitch-perfect comment:

‘Born from zhets’. Oh wait…

In second place was Hooniverse’s Crumpet-&-Rainshowers Editor, Chris Haining, aka Rust-MyEnemy, offering this bit of rhyming whimsy:

I drive this car because I’m Ukranian.
I wear my hair like this to conceal my huge cranium.
And something about a dog.

The thread that followed is equally entertaining, but don’t go read it until after you’ve done your homework, which is turning the customization of this Ford Econoline into commentary gold.