Breaking News- Ford Announces The '93 Taurus

Ford Unveils New Car For Cash-Strapped Buyers: The 1993 Taurus

Sometimes the Onion can be damn-funny.

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  1. joshuman Avatar

    In 1995, my girlfriend (now wife of 10 years) had a 1993 Taurus. It was a hand me down from her Mother, who had it foisted upon her as a company car. It was comfortable enough to drive even if I hated the transmission but the speedo only went up to 80 MPH so I had no idea how fast I was really going. I'm sure at some point we did listen to Primus Sailing the Seas of Cheese on the long drive back from college.
    The car was on its second transmission when we met. Her parents sold it before it needed a third.

  2. Age_of_Aerostar Avatar

    The Onion is funny, I've loved it for years. However…. It's annoying to me that he said it came with a 3.1L V6. Taurus that year had 3.0 V6, or optional 3.8 V6. (3.2 V6 in the SHO) I'll let the 5-speed manual reference in the ad preview slide, because you could get that in the SHO.

    1. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

      Oh so you want your satire to be perfect now? Oh, right forgot where I was.

      1. FTGDHoonEdition Avatar

        You have NO clue about who you're talking to here. A-O-A is a certified Mr.Ford authority.

        1. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

          Oh right, sorry, don't take my star away…
          Props to AOA for knowing the intricacies of the Taurus. Reminds me of this guy who used to be fanatical about Tempos…

          1. FTGDHoonEdition Avatar

            We don't have STARhoods here, we have KNIGHThoods, in the best traditions of the Canadian Queen, Her Majesty Elizabeth II.
            p.s: I am not really up to date about the British-Canadian knowledge so someone help me! Help!

          2. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

            So what does a Hoon have to do to become a DarthHoon?

    2. baldy_pm Avatar

      Yeah, I was annoyed by that too. The Taurus has NEVER had a 3.1 liter displacement engine. The 3.1 was GM's vaunted chunk of schitt.