A country boy can survive

We make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
Ain’t too many things these old boys can’t do
We grow good ole tomatoes and homemade wine
And a country boy can survive country folks can survive
Because you can’t starve us out and you can’t make us run
Cause we’se them ole boys raised on shotguns
We say grace and we say mamm if you ain’t in to that we don’t give a damn

I’m fairly certain when Hank Williams Jr. penned those lyrics he wasn’t thinking  about backwoods vasectomys.

Needle threaded

This does not appear to be one of those times when someone was out screwing around, not paying attention to what they were doing.  It looks more like a freak accident that was more or less unavoidable.  They gate appears to have been hidden by the surrounding foliage and the driver was just a hair too close.  Add to that the fact the road is narrow and the sun was most likely in his eyes and the guy probably never even saw the gate.  People, I cannot stress this enough, stay up to date on your tetanus shots and always carry around a change of undies!
It takes cojones of steel to not soil yourself when your cojones are met abruptly by steel

This is a sword fight no man could win

 Thankfully nobody was injured in this freak accident.
Source: Landrovergeeks

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  1. CptSevere Avatar

    Great Balls Of Fire!
    I was thinking about taking up jousting, but after seeing this I'm having second thoughts.

  2. BigfootHunter Avatar

    Wow, amazing that the at interior isn't completely blood-soaked…any idea of the speed involved? Was he a one legged man before this looks like that should have taken out his left knee as well.

    1. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

      Yeah, that looks to be about where my knee sits when I drive… I wonder how they got all the gore out so fast.

  3. Feds_II Avatar

    I wonder what role the grill guard played in this accident. If it were not there, perhaps the gate would have deflected away from the truck rather than puncturing it.
    I know that's not clever or insightful, but after market accessories can kill!

    1. dculberson Avatar

      Brush "guards" are also damage multipliers – in really minor contacts that might cause a scratch or a scuff on your bumper they bend up sheet metal behind them. They're not generally a good idea.
      Although it does look like this guy at least drives in an area where protection from bush would be a useful thing!

  4. Tomsk Avatar

    You know how some people say most fullsize pickup drivers are compensating for something? This guy almost proved 'em right.

  5. Charles_Barrett Avatar

    I was wondering what in the blazes you were going on about in this article (backwoods vasectomys…???) until I scrolled down to that third photo… Yikes…!
    I dated a guy many years ago who tells the story of the time he was a passenger in his boss' car on the L.A. freeways, when a flatbed stake truck ahead of them lost a steel stake. He watched it cartwheel in the roadway before it came down through the windshield and pierced the seat cushion between his thighs, inches away from his groin.

    1. CptSevere Avatar


      1. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

        That's not cool under any conditions… including movies.

  6. LTDScott Avatar


    1. Goingincirclez Avatar

      Homestar reference FTW!

    2. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar

      I would thumbs-up you again if I could.

    3. aSoundofSleep Avatar

      I brought you your fondu pot!

  7. FTGDHoonEdition Avatar

    All I can say is, "Holy Shit!" Pardon my French.

    1. JeepyJayhawk Avatar

      I bet he said that too.

      1. Thrashy Avatar

        I'll bet, in fact, that it was a mere second or third on the list of French things he said.

        1. Maymar Avatar

          He probably learned the term "tabernac" pretty quickly.

  8. Goingincirclez Avatar

    I still can't believe the odds of that gate precisely entering that tiny space 'tween headlight and grille guard. Universal Karma was out to send this poor guy a warning. Maybe he built the Bronco/Eclipse?

    1. Sparky_Pete Avatar

      2 or 3 years ago I shish-kabobbed a brand new rental H3 between the tailight and tailgate with a similar gate while trying to back out of a deep snow and ice filled pit. The truck slid sideways and BAMM!
      When I got out to look the gate blade had slipped right through the panel gap and punched a hole in the interior I could see through, yet missed the lens and bodywork completely! Not one visible scratch.I'm still amazed at my luck, and never rented without LDW again.

  9. P161911 Avatar

    The other sad part about this is that truck is probably close to, if not actually totaled. You just punched a large hole through the firewall, the fender, and the dash, taking out who know how many components and wires along the way. This one would be great for the junkyard. I've been thinking about searching out a Gen III/IV Vortec truck engine as a relatively low cost replacement engine for my 77 Corvette.
    Wonder what the two extra toggle switches on the dash were for?

  10. hdcs Avatar

    Fat lot of good that jungle gym on the front did this driver. Reminiscent of this Jeep incident a few years ago.
    Wait for it…

    1. HeinzInc Avatar

      Damn. Imagine what he did once he stopped the car. Look down and whimper? Maybe.

  11. aSoundofSleep Avatar

    Has anyone stopped to think that this may have been a women, and she enjoyed it?
    Change backwoods vasectomys into backwoods RO-DE-O!!! WOOOO!!!
    /Uncalled for

  12. coupeZ600 Avatar

    I've driven a big truck for almost 30 years now and over 3 million miles and never hit anything, a car, another truck, a mailbox,…. nothing, except for three gates. I sometimes wished I had hit a car instead, because then it would get fixed, worn out, and then go away. Gates just hang around (bent/twisted), constantly causing the person who has to use the gate everyday to curse you, years and years later. This gate will never close right again, and while it will be a good laugh for the guy/girl that has to close it for the next couple of years, all the next group of people that need to use this gate will think is, "Chevy's Suck!" without having any idea.

  13. inhyvw Avatar

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